texastweeter this, sir, is absolutely delicious!!!
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He failed to mention that the chili constitution and his powers as self-appointed minister only apply on his own property.
However, that was an entertaining read.
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I was actually voted and appointed this title by the Supreme Leader Panhead John back on April 1st -
Decree #2 - texastweeter will be heading up our newly formed Department of Chili. After meeting last night with Adam, my new Secretary of Chili….we have decided to implement new language and procedures when posting or describing anything chili related. The previous administration has allowed this to go on for far too long. I’m referring to “beans in chili”
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This thread should be called "The Constitution of TEXAS Chili"
Thankfully, food preparation is regional. Here in the Pacific Northwest, it isn't a pot of chili unless it has a pound of beans and an ounce of cannabis, which according to your constitution neither are allowed.
So, enjoy your bowl of spicy soup, while we eat solid food, fart, and laugh hysterically. ;-)Comment
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I smell Hippie Chili. Someone git a rope...Last edited by CaptainMike; April 10, 2026, 11:52 PM. -
I promise you that there is enough shine going around, you wont need the devils lettuce.
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I strongly oppose Article VI!Comment
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On the one hand, there is only one true chili: meat, reconstituted dried peppers, garlic, cumin, Mexican oregano, water.
On the other hand, if it tastes good, then it is good.
Sometimes I think one is right, sometimes I think the other is right. But most of the time I just think, “Where’s the spoon? No, not that one. The BIG one.”
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Either way it was a fun read...Comment
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Chili, like BBQ, so good so many ways. With or without, I say yes.
Or as a friend once said, I have friends who hate beans in chili and friends who love beans in chili. So when it come to yes or no, I 100% support my friends on this subject.Last edited by Purc; April 11, 2026, 09:49 AM.Comment
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How doth the Minister and his fair Texas brethren feel about crackers? They are mentioned neither in "Optional lawful adjuncts" nor "Final garnish", but I refuse to assume anything as I hope to some day relocate to your fair state and proclaim that most solemn of oaths, that being that "I wasn’t born in Texas, but I got there as fast as I could".Comment
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Crackers are a welcome addition to my chili……on the side. I had a friend over one time and served him some of my home made chili, gave him some saltines on the side. The S.O.B. then proceeded to crumble them up INTO his bowl of chili!!! I chewed him out and let him know that if the recipe called for crackers in my chili I would have put them in there in the first place! He never did that again. 🤓Last edited by Panhead John; April 11, 2026, 07:04 PM. -
Sid P My sister did the same thing one time with some gumbo I made. I said the same thing to her……..🤓
I did say it in a joking way to both of them. I’m not a total A-hole. 😂Last edited by Panhead John; April 11, 2026, 12:44 PM.
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I am a Chili Anarchist who embraces the philosophy and emphasizes absolute individual freedom to choose how they want to enjoy their chili.
I have the right to put beans (or whatever) in my chili. And I will exercise that right until you pry the spoon from my cold, dead hands.
signed… Citizens for the Right to Enjoy Chili.
But seriously, chili without beans is just a spicy dip…….
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texastweeter I’m coming to the San Marcos meat up next week and I’m ordering chili and packing beans. -
Panhead John be sure and aquaint TripleB with a hillbilly suntan if he dares defile the Red. -
And Spaghetti, n chopped onion, or even shredded cheddar chee n mebe an oyster crackie er two. Then by gawd we eat!
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Ah language, the essence of communication and understanding.............until it isn't.
There are many examples that I could use, but I'll draw on the construction industry for this one. Measuring a perfectly horizontal line is called "level". Measuring a perfectly vertical line is called "plumb". But you'll often hear folks say they are checking for "level" with a tool on a vertical line/surface. Now, this isn't the crime of the century, it's just ignorance of proper terminology, or use of language. Those of us aware of this error will usually make allowances for the ignorance and pay it appropriate heed. Unless....if I'm interviewing building contractors for a project important to me one that displays ignorance of something endemic to his industry will eliminate himself from consideration as capable.
Likewise with concrete structures. The lazy or ill-informed will often refer to a sidewalk or driveway as being a "cement" structure, when in reality it is a "concrete" structure. Cement is a component of concrete, but not the entirety of its makeup. Again, we make do if it's part of a conversation with a neighbor since it has little functional impact, but it does cause a double clutch for the informed to have to momentarily translate the incorrect to the correct for understanding sake. If a supposed concrete contractor makes that error he's out of contention.
So it is with the folks who pretend that bean stew is chili. We graciously understand that they believe they are correct, but we make allowance for their naivete. After all, we aren't going to hire them to make real chili since they don't really know what it is.
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texastweeter, i just followed the same importance in capitalization like you did in your profile name, you set the tone, texas does not matter. 😜 -
Lol, truth be told I did all lowercase so I wouldn't get logging in all mixed up, lol. Richard Chrz
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OK, so it is fusion cuisine. Can't we all just get along? 😁Comment
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As a natural born rebel. Most have found that their rules or constitution are rarely even considered suggestions to me.
. I respect it. Just know—you’re not the first to kick down the door dramatically. The hallway is full of capes from people who tried before ..
But hey, at least you make it entertaining. 😂
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Uncle Bob But that vertical line is only plumb relative to the center of the earth. Once you leave Earth, “plumb” has no meaning.
And so it is with chili when you leave Texas. In Texas, chili is plumb, plumb is vertical, and chili has no beans. Everywhere else, well…
“When I use a word, it means just what I choose it to mean—neither more nor less.”
And that is what we are left with. Some moke in New Hampshire dumps ground beef into V8 juice, adds a teaspoon of McCormick’s, and serves it over spaghetti, and that’s chili.
You gotta draw a line somewhere. But where?Comment
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I think I know why beans are not allowed in Texas Chili. Texas Chili is made as a Big Pot of Chili, and because everything is BIG in Texas, no little beans are allowed.
Is my understanding correct, or what?
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So, most folks in Texas think chili shouldn’t have beans. And most folks in forty-nine sister states think chili shouldn’t have beans if you want them. More states. More land mass. More people. Texas loses. Either Texans start putting beans in their chili or they don’t. Who cares? They just need to stop whining at the rest of us.Comment
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