Meat Up! done right

[ofelles]

Enough of the traditional or old school meatups. You people in the south and east think you know it all. My wife (she/her) and I (he/him on even days and gender neutral on odd days) propose a modern California gathering/seance. We will hold it on the summer solstice of course. Dress will be casual hippy or skyclad.

The menu: Smoked tofu burnt ends, celery ribs cooked St Louis style, slow cooker plant-based brisket with a secret honey/vegan cream cheese vinegarette, grilled chicken (only if the humanly raised coddled bird is willing to sacrifice it's body at the alter), links (both tofu and plant based), natural grasses salad with special herb dressing blessed by our local Shaman. Plus many other sides like par boiled wheat germ and ?
Hopefully CaptainMike will bring his Brussel sprout chili with extra beans. Mike says he lives in the State of Jefferson, but we Californians are open minded and inclusive so we let him have his fantasy. I’m sure Panhead John will not want to miss this opportunity and he/him can make his Texas clam chowder.
Everything will be cooked on electric grills of course because we have outlawed gas and it will be a Spare the Air Day so no burning of wood is allowed.

Plenty of refreshments to be had if you bring your own but I have some really righteous acid I will cook up!

So, whose as excited as I am? More details will be worked out in the coming months. I will be consulting with my Shaman and the Ouija board for more.

Sign up now we have a very limited number of Yurts available but there is a Unhoused encampments close by with a few tents if your willing to clean them up a little.

If you've gotten this far and you're offended. There will be trained professionals there that are really good at pretending they care.

[HawkerXP]

[smokenoob]

I’ll have to check the freight train schedule to see if I can hop one. I plan to be homeless and was wondering if I will be issued a tent, bedding, and food stamps at the border? Just me/he.

[ofelles]

Of course. plus your first check will be waiting.

[SheilaAnn]

smokenoob it’s California, come over, we’ll put you up!

[CaptainMike]

I'm in!!!

[Oak Smoke]

I’ll probably have to pass. I’ve already offended our neighbors from California. I think I’d be pressing my luck being around a crowd of them.

[CaptainMike]

Did you tell them "You're welcome here, just leave there there and don't bring there here or here will become there and there are no other heres to go there to"?

[Oak Smoke]

Our neighbors decided that in order to look like the locals they would buy horses. One of their horses learned how to open the gate to the little pasture they stay in. I look up one day to see 3 horses in the front yard and go out to see if I can get them out of the yard before they eat the wife’s flowers. The neighbors walk up and I ask if I can help get the horses back in. I was given a very indignant decline. I spent the next hour laughing until I hurt watching them. Now they won’t even wave.

[CaptainMike]

That sounds about right. Californians weren't always like that, but I'm afraid quite a lot are now, especially along the coast. They all seem to know it all and are angry and offended at anything and everything. There's still a lot of courteous and friendly Californians who live out in the country, but I'm guessing your neighbors aren't those folks.

[RichieB]

ofelles you have too much time on your hands and what r u smoking?

[ofelles]

Hey it's medicinal! Plus I know this guy whose brother in law knows this gal......

[Alan Brice]

I'll have a pound of that! Can I work off my bill? I have a fairly green thumb(from rolling)
also just retired not quite a month ago. Soo no huge dependancies as of yet. Eh?

[texastweeter]

This just made the virtual meeting I am having to sith through about sensitivity training bearable. Why am I in a sensitivity training meeting you ask? Whelp it's a long story...

[texastweeter]

ofelles Oak Smoke CaptainMike see above.

[Oak Smoke]

Through some terrible mistake we’ve empowered a group of people who’ve never had power before. They’ve not yet come to terms with the difference between power and absolute power. No one who’s been part of a successful business wants absolute power to be wielded by anyone with an agenda like that.

[Oak Smoke]

I promised a story of my own. The last year before I retired we were bought by a group that wanted to put a little lipstick on the pig and sell us for a nice profit. I paid very little attention to it all because I was a successful salesman who had never been given any grief. I soon learned we had acquired an HR dept. One morning I received a call informing me I had offended some one in the company. I was told they could not tell me who, when, or where because I would know who it was. I hung up.

[MBMorgan]

Count me in … in a heartbeat!

[Stuey1515]

Love to come but unfortunately I recently have identified as trans-parent thus my pronouns are who/where

[texastweeter]

Can I identify as Trans-slender?

[ofelles]

Hey, we're adding new pronouns all the time. Come on up!

[Steve B]

texastweeter I'd be more on the side of Trans-Fat

[RiverJeff]

I'm going to have to pass however I do have some extra beauties a few micro dots and about 6oz of honey oil I can ship to your gathering. Keep your eye out for that box of fresh ground coffee marked ("Dads Best")
Wishing you the best of trips!

[ofelles]

And a heart felt thank you!!

[CaptainMike]

Just don't ship it USPS and you'll be fine!

[Michael_in_TX]

I genuinely laughed out loud at the yurts.

[CaptainMike]

I've seen whole housing developments of yurts out here.

[RonB]

It seems I have a reputaion as being non-woke and am banned from CA.

[ofelles]

Yea, I can't get closer than 5 miles from Santa Cruz or Berkley!

[CHNeal]

Pretty sure my redneck a.. wouldn’t last 15 mins, but ill bet it would be a fun 15minutes!

[hoovarmin]

Perhaps we just consider this a hostile invasion and takeover.

[Allon]

Revolution!

We can overthrow the local lottery system!
We can make scented lottery tickets! Loser aromatherapy!
We can make the big dollar tickets tell you if you won or lost!

[hoovarmin]

Allon I've got your six

[Steve B]

WHAT. No Fresh Mushrooms? What kind of event is this?

[texastweeter]

Thats Colorado

[bbqLuv]

Magic Mushrooms?

[Steve B]

bbqLuv What other kinds are there?