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FAIL! (photos & stories of recipe mishaps and oopses)

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    Click image for larger version  Name:	ECF20C4A-2648-4513-B108-43983FABBD1F.jpeg Views:	13 Size:	703.0 KB ID:	808554Click image for larger version  Name:	3A88A4EB-5E2A-456C-A96E-827F3AD23D5B.jpeg Views:	12 Size:	696.6 KB ID:	808555 First grill pizza attempt, some time back. More like an amoeba, or an amoezza? Still tasty.
    Last edited by Texas Larry; February 26, 2020, 07:50 AM.

    Comment


    • texastweeter
      texastweeter commented
      Editing a comment
      Call it "rustic", and people will pay even more.

    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      Thing is, you knew it looked like that goin in.

    • surfdog
      surfdog commented
      Editing a comment
      My ex and I used to do kinda the same thing with tortillas...
      We called them "geographic tortillas" because some looked like Texas, some the whole U.S., Brazil, perhaps Africa or China. LOL

      Pretty much every shape EXCEPT round.

    I killed this lamb leg steak over my sear burner. It was well overdone. I even took a picture of me doing it.

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    • Charley Langer
      Charley Langer commented
      Editing a comment
      Yeah Baby!! 😂

    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      Nice bark!

    Epic Instant Pot Stupidity....

    So I use the Instant Pot often for making yogurt. The normal process is to pre-boil the milk, let cool, add starter, let sit for 8-10 hours or so.

    Last week It was time to make some yogurt but I had something in the Instant Pot stainless steel liner in the refrigerator.

    So I boiled the gallon of milk in a separate pot. The idea being while the milk was cooling, I would wash out the stainless steel liner and continue the process in the Instant Pot. I did that but got distracted and forgot to put the liner back into the Instant Pot.

    When the milk cooled, I dumped the entire gallon into the Instant Pot without the liner....Oops....Milk all over, inside the cabinet, drawers, silverware, big giant mess. It also tripped the GFCI outlet. So I unplugged immediately, shook it out as best as I could and set it aside. Cleaned the mess as best as possible and wondered if I ruined an $89.00 appliance. The Instant Pot electronics were already wet so I took the sink sprayer and washed out the milk and shook it out again. I set it in the pantry to dry for several days just to see if it was ruined or not.

    Meanwhile, even though my wife and I cleaned all the milk mess thoroughly, the spoiled smell has been persisting. We are like on our third clean trying to get rid go that spoiled milk smell..

    The good thing is it seems the Instant Pot is working fine and we think we killed the smell.

    Cosas que pasa....Things that happen...

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    Last edited by troymeister; March 23, 2020, 09:59 AM.

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    • Charley Langer
      Charley Langer commented
      Editing a comment
      Thanks for that! 😂

    • pkadare
      pkadare commented
      Editing a comment
      (sheepishly raising my hand as someone who has also done this, though with water only)

    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      Ps. Ya don’t need an instant pot to make yogurt. Let it cool
      Until you can dip yer pinky in it for 7-8 Seconds. 3-4 tbsp of culture mixed with like amnt of warm milk, stir. Then wrap in your warmest parka (with lid on) & you have yogurt in the morning.

    Oh, gosh, troymeister , that's awful. What a mess. I've read on several occasions on the interwebs about that happening to IP users. In fact, there are several comments about how to fix the IP if it gets wonky. Here's one link for that:



    Hope you get the smell out of the cabinetry too.

    Best wishes,
    Kathryn

    Comment


    • troymeister
      troymeister commented
      Editing a comment
      fzxdoc Thank you....Makes me feel a little better that I'm not the only one...lol...

    I'm calling this a fail, although I learned a few things and the next one should be better.

    I have wanted to try making octopus, either on the grill or smoker. I've had it in restaurants more than once and I've been impressed. So, seeing smoked tako poke made on TV, I tried to do a little research. You can find some information, but I wouldn't call it comprehensive instructions. My butcher also sells seafood, and he had baby octopus frozen. So....

    Thawed it out, and then put it in a bowl with a lot of salt, and massaged the salt in. Then rinsed. This is supposed to remove the slime. Then laid it out on a rack and sheet pan and stuck it in the fridge to get a pellicle.
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    Onto the smoker at 225. I had it there for about 3.5 hours.
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    OK, the obvious problem here is they are overdone. Some were harder than jerky. I think a larger beast might have handled it better, but small means less time. Also, I needed to do a better job of getting them rinsed. Too much salt. Maybe even a soak, like pastrami.

    Chopped them up.
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    Cut up some green onion and mixed up a spicy mayo, and mixed in.
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    It's edible. There are a few more tender pieces in there. Awfully salty. Fairly fishy too. Next time should be better.

    Comment


    • Donw
      Donw commented
      Editing a comment
      Next time will be better! I really like octopus but have only eaten it in restaurants.

    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      Pics 2 & 3 says it all. Rather funny lookin. Nice recovery with yer outcome.

    • Dewesq55
      Dewesq55 commented
      Editing a comment
      My buddy who's Greek "off the boat" makes octopus on the grill which comes out great. I think he usually used the larger ones, though. Yours actually looks pretty good. As you say, you'll do much better the next time.

    Bowl of raw chicken slipped through my hands and shattered. I salvaged what I could of the salvageable chicken. Figured insane heat in wok will kill anything. The fried rice was still really good!! Big bowl of it because the kids like it too!! Makes me happy!
    Attached Files

    Comment


    • Dewesq55
      Dewesq55 commented
      Editing a comment
      Don't you just hate when that happens? The fried rice looked good, though.

    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      You must not have a dog.

    First time I tried to deep fry a Prime Rib, I guessed at about 10 degrees of carry over after it came out of the oil. Turns out 50 degrees is probably a better guess. There was a very small part in the very center that was just grossly overcooked. The rest was trim.

    Not long ago I had prime brisket turn to leather on me. Cooked it no different than I usually do, but for some reason, when I cut into it, all the moisture was just gone. Even the point was dry. Still don't know how or why, but there were some disappointed looks when the pizza delivery gal showed up with supper that night.

    I'm pretty sure I've had more rib cooks go wrong than I have gotten right, but I cooked a lot of ribs before I had ever heard of The Pit, so that's more Meatheads fault for not inventing the internet, and creating this site sooner.

    I've started enough kitchen/oven fires, that they barely cause any excitement these days. Everyone in the house knows of to put them out quickly and usually without wrecking the food, but at the same time, we all know where the fire extinguisher is, and how to use it. On the plus side, I no longer automatically keep 2 extinguishers on hand, you know just because we'll be making dinner again tomorrow.

    In many ways I think it's great that I have soooooooo many disaster stories about trying to make a meal. Everyone of them has help get to where I am now, and at least in the words of the folks eating what I'm making, I'm in a pretty good spot.

    Almost forget the banana coal I made last week! It started out wanting to be banana bread, but I stuck it in the oven, washed my hands, and SQUIRREL! Forgot to set the timer before heading out to the shop. After getting home from work the girlfriend brought out the still smoldering pan of blackness, and informed me that even if we have always agreed the one who cooks doesn't have to clean, she is NOT cleaning up this one. She did not buy the explanation that it was a new recipe for blackened Cajun banana bread..

    Comment


    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      Ya coulda told her ya were just experimenting & trying to make a diamond for her. Ya know, old & new technology stuff.

    First time I went to make guacamole bought rock hard avocados got home cut them and realized what I did, such a dummy. Live and learn I guess. Cooking wise I’ve messed up a few dishes in my day photo wise you wouldn’t of know more so taste and or texture.

    Comment


    • FireMan
      FireMan commented
      Editing a comment
      So, how was it?

    • gmascolo51
      gmascolo51 commented
      Editing a comment
      If you are referring to the guacamole I would of needed a mortar and pestle to make it 😂

    • Mr. Bones
      Mr. Bones commented
      Editing a comment
      Killer remedy when faced with Rock hard avos, an faced with servin several hunnnert to several thou with a viable, yummy guac

      Wail, sir, while my manager, an shift supervisor was wringin they hands, an all kinda gnashin they teeths over th impendin disaster, I jus threw th avos in a stack steamer, fer a few mikes....

      They was all kinda smooth as buttah, then, an I even gotta raise outta that deal...
      Last edited by Mr. Bones; August 9, 2020, 06:11 AM.

    Well - short version is its almost 10 pm and the ribs I thought I'd have by 6 are still cooking
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    Tried to do pork butt and PB burnt ends and ribs all in one cook.


    The PB burnt ends were fantastic.
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    The pulled pork came out great. Sorry. No pics.

    But mid cook my buddy stopped by and beers a were had, and it rained on my charcoal and my Fireboard ran out of juice and Yada Yada Yada....

    I took my eye off the ball and my ribs have been smoking at 150 instead of 250......so they still have a ways to go
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    The food done has been good but I have over promised and under delivered.


    We did have some tasty bourbon though

    Comment


    • Mr. Bones
      Mr. Bones commented
      Editing a comment
      Nice Job.
      Never underestimate th importance of Good Bourbon, while cookin up some BBQ.

    • BFlynn
      BFlynn commented
      Editing a comment
      The ribs are pretty good today.
      Just need to pay more attention next time.

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    "Fail" ribs

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      BFlynn , back in my early AR days I did the opposite. There might even be pics in the archives somewhere, just not on this thread. I was doin my third or fourth cook on my Napoleon, chickie I think, and I was tryin like a son of a pup to get the temp up to 350 and was really struggling with my thermoworks gadget cuz my readin was 275 or somethin. Smoke was pourin out of the grill from my pouch of wood chips, which went up in no time at’all. Then more smoke from the 2nd bag of chips instantly, oh well. I waited it out til more smoke, t’was the chickie pieces this time. But, but how can that be, I dunna understand, then I saw the big C on my thermo-meter. Oops! Never again says I.
      Last edited by FireMan; August 8, 2020, 07:04 PM.

      Comment


      • BFlynn
        BFlynn commented
        Editing a comment
        Foiled again by the metric system!!

        {shakes angry fist}

      • Mr. Bones
        Mr. Bones commented
        Editing a comment
        Oh, I am SO Lovin this one, How Classic, Brother!!!

      This happened a few days ago. In all my desire to be efficient, I decided to roast some beans in a 12” Griz. Well, I thought I’d sneak in a few brats & 2 burgers before I cooked the coffee. Mistake! Instead of 8 to 10 minute it took 40 to 50 due to dying coals. Lesson learned. Click image for larger version

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      Comment


      • Huskee
        Huskee commented
        Editing a comment
        Dying coal syndrome is no fun. Been there a lot. Mostly when cooking on the beach and getting sidetracked then rememebering I need to toss the brats on.

      Cooked some burgers and zucchini on the grill Friday.

      For some reason I thought the burgers were beef but as you can see they were pork. My wife hates pork and promptly gagged when taking a bite. Oops. I just had it fixed in my mind that burgers = beef.

      The zucchini tasted good with the seasonings (garlic, salt, pepper, lemon juice, olive oil, bbq rub) but I used too much oil and they were too greasy. Couldn’t really eat more than a few.

      FAIL.

      Attached Files

      Comment


      • FireMan
        FireMan commented
        Editing a comment
        That sounds like some good stuff!

      • STEbbq
        STEbbq commented
        Editing a comment
        The meat itself was very high quality and I would like to duplicate the recipe with beef..

      No pics, because, well the end result was plain white chicken breasts.

      I wanted to fry fried chicken in the deep fryer for the first time this weekend. So, I breaded and battered all my wonderful chicken breasts (about 1.5 pds) with this lovely Nashville hot batter. Dumped it all into my frying basket, and lowered it into my 400 degree oil on the smoker in the Dutch oven.

      And.....because all of the chicken was bunched together, all of the batter promptly fell off. Sigh.

      When I did the Pioneer chicken batch (another 1.5 pds) a few minutes later, I dropped them in there one by one, and they turned out great. I only did a single layer of about 4 pieces to cover the bottom of the basket though. Is it not possible to layer the chicken in the basket if you drop them in one by one? Seems to defeat the purpose of having a big Dutch oven and basket if you can only do four strips at a time, but maybe I will try layering in a few more pieces one by one next time.

      Also, loaded up the basket to the brim with my French fries, only to be surprised the double frying didn't lead to perfectly crispy French fries. Clearly using about 1/3 to 1/2 of the amount of fries next time will keep the oil hotter and cook them to crispy.

      Still, not too bad for the first-time fryer.
      Attached Files
      Last edited by STEbbq; October 21, 2021, 11:46 AM. Reason: Found pioneer chicken pics

      Comment


      • Steak Snake
        Steak Snake commented
        Editing a comment
        That doesn't look bad at all and batter frying is harder than breaded. Frying is like BBQ. You eat a bunch of mistakes until you have the feel for it.

      • STEbbq
        STEbbq commented
        Editing a comment
        I cooked the Pioneer ones about 9 minutes but I think it was a bit long. Maybe do 5-6 minutes next time. I look forward to trying again soon.

      So many along the way I would not know where to start, although I call them lessons in practice.

      Comment

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