This is a membership forum. As a guest, you can click around a bit. View 5 pages for free. If you would like to participate, please join.

[ Pitmaster Club Information | Join Now | Login | Contact Us ]

There are 4 page views remaining.


No announcement yet.

Fail. Moron.

  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Fail. Moron.

    The other day I thought I'd grill some wings and drumsticks. We wanted to try out the Gold BBQ sauce as a cooked on sauce instead of a topping for pulled pork. I put some fresh briquettes in the bottom of the charcoal chimney and topped it off with leftovers from the last cook. I lit the paper and waited. Then I lit it again. Then I took it out, repacked it, and lit it again. Then I lit it again. Hmmm... The coals finally lit after about 20 minutes. I have never had that kind of trouble getting coals started in the chimney, not even the first time I used it.

    Forgetting how fast those leftover coals tend to burn out, I let the chimney set too long. I dumped the coals in and started cooking. Man, it was taking a long time to get those legs up to temp. I wanted them about 25 degrees below done before I put the wings on. I added coals and kept going. Once I put the wings on, the legs should've been a few minutes from being done. But, they weren't. I wanted to finish the legs and rotate them out, then put the other half of the wings on, etc. Realizing it was going to take too long, I decided to fire up the gasser to finish the wings.

    Now, me, wings, and this grill have fought before. I typically end up losing. Once I trashed 5lbs worth of wings. Yes, it's a cheap grill, and yes, I am an advocate of cheap grills. I get more life out of them per dollar spent than I do good grills. So, I put the wings on go in the house to get the sauce. That was just long enough to get a nice flare up, which resulted in a half dozen blackened wings. At least the other two burners didn't flare. So, I am WAY past the time I wanted to eat, the stuff on the Weber isn't done and the fire is getting lower and lower, and I have wings on the gasser that look like they went through a crematorium. I ended up having to move some wings from the Weber to the gasser just to get them done.

    I think that is one of the dumbest failures I've had in many years, except for the complete loss of 5lbs. of wings on thie SAME grill. The cheaper grill I had a couple of years ago never flared like this.

    Talk about making stupid rookie mistakes. The cook was doomed from the start. Once I had trouble with the chimney I should've went to bed and told my wife to bake them. Anyway, I figure fair is fair. I don't mind posting my successes, may as well post failures too.

    The gold sauce is AMAZING. if you haven't tried it yet, please do so.

    Did you ever figure out what went wrong with your charcoal, Usernamevalid ? Have you had unexpectedly slow cooks like that before on your Weber?

    And it sounds like that gasser is still trying to school you. I'm sure you'll turn the tables on it for the next cook.

    Thanks for sharing your story.



      There is a " Fail " thread here : We all get it wrong sometimes - nothing wrong with that...Pics would have been nice too....




      • Steve Vojtek
        Steve Vojtek commented
        Editing a comment
        still not working....sorry

      Yeah, it'd be nice to merge this topic in with the Fail topic, if that's what you'd like, Usernamevalid . Maybe one of the moderators would do that.

      Here's the link to the Fail topic that Huskee started:


      It's on the 4th page of the Recipes and Techniques forum. Maybe they can make it a sticky so we can find it easier. (Not that I'm eager to have a fail to post about! )

      Last edited by fzxdoc; July 12, 2015, 07:43 AM.


      Usernamevalid what is this Gold Sauce you speak of?



      Columbia Gold Sauce


      Shake it off, @usernamevalid

      You've had bunches of great cooks. These things happen to all most all of us. And usually at what we think is the worst possible time!

      Personally, I think it makes us more honest! Keeps us from being to cocky, and ultimately, makes us better.

      Learn, adjust and hurry back in the saddle, brother!
      Last edited by richinlbrg; July 12, 2015, 09:29 AM.


        Originally posted by fzxdoc View Post
        Did you ever figure out what went wrong with your charcoal,
        A combination of things. A, I let it burn too long before dumping it in the grill. B, I used some leftover from a previous cook, which was used up really fast, and C, a granddaughter who kept calling Puppa to push her on the swing.


        • ontheranch
          ontheranch commented
          Editing a comment
          no fail here ... You're granddaughter won't remember what she ate here, but she WILL remember her Puppa pushed her on the swing! Successful cookout if you ask me.

        • richinlbrg
          richinlbrg commented
          Editing a comment
          With "C" in the mix, I would say you have impeccable perspective.

          I don't care what is going on, how much of a "bada$$" you are, when a child says ring, ring and hands you the phone, you answer it. LOL


      No announcement yet.
      Rubs Promo
      Meat-Up in Memphis