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Meat-Up in Memphis 2021

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Jokes!

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  • holehogg
    Club Member
    • Nov 2017
    • 2328
    • Port Elizabeth, South Africa

    panteracfh3 I think my mother in law is nearly Irish.
    Her first names Iris.

    Comment

    • wu7y
      Club Member
      • Oct 2017
      • 130
      • Gillette Wyoming

      Understanding names can be a real challenge. I was 11 or 12 years old before I realized my first name was not "goddammit". Apparently I was something of a challenge as well.

      Comment


      • Elton's BBQ
        Elton's BBQ commented
        Editing a comment
        Haha class!

      • Bogy
        Bogy commented
        Editing a comment
        I thought my brother in law had died. I didn't realize he moved to Gillette Wyoming!
    • ribeyeguy
      Charter Member
      • Jun 2015
      • 1297
      • S. E. Wisconsin
      • Weber Platinum Performer, 18"WSM, Smokenator, Slow 'n Sear.

      We have a cleaning crew that comes in to work once a week. One of the women has an obvious issue with walking as one leg is considerably shorter than the other. Today I introduced myself and asked her name. Eileen she said.

      Yeah, I know. Old joke.

      Comment


      • Huskee
        Huskee commented
        Editing a comment
        The Dovers- Eileen & Ben?

      • wu7y
        wu7y commented
        Editing a comment
        And what about the Normal brothers - Sub and Ab?

      • HawkerXP
        HawkerXP commented
        Editing a comment
        I went to school with the "Bright Brothers" Not so and Ain't so.
    • holehogg
      Club Member
      • Nov 2017
      • 2328
      • Port Elizabeth, South Africa

      And the guy with no legs called Neil

      Comment


      • CaptainMike
        CaptainMike commented
        Editing a comment
        Uh-oh, here we go.........

      • Bogy
        Bogy commented
        Editing a comment
        A piece of coal for you, and a piece of coal for you, and a piece of coal for you...

        I talked about the tradition of naughty little kids getting coal during a children's time a few years ago, and it didn't have the same impact. "Santa's gonna bring me a rock that burns? COOL!"
    • Craigar
      Founding Member
      • Jul 2014
      • 1101
      • Papillion, NE
      • * - Weber 26.75" OTG
        * - Weber 22.5" Premium cloaked in Crimson
        * - Slow 'N Sear
        * - Smoke E-Z - 26.75" (The Grain Silo)
        * - Lodge Sportsman Grill
        * - Weber Rapid Fire Chimney Starter
        * - Thermoworks ThermoPop
        * - Thermoworks Dot
        * - iGrill2 - 4 probes
        * - Favorite Beer - the cold one in my hand (craft beers of all flavors; haven't had a blue yummy in over 6 years) my tastes change with the season so it is difficult to name just a couple. However, I will occasionally have a vanilla porter float in the summer (Empyrean Vanilla Porter w/a scoop of homemade vanilla ice cream) as I usually drink stouts & porters in the colder months, pale ales & IPAs in the warmer months. I have to add Not Your Father's Root Beer to beers I use for floats.
        * - Booze - I don't really have a favorite, but lean towards single malt Scotch & Irish whiskey
        * - Wines - Reds: mainly the heavy stuff mixed in with the occasional pinot noir ( I have yet to meet a malbec I didn't like); Whites: German & Nebraska (hey, I have to support the home team)
        * - Favorite Spice outlets - Frisco Spices in LaVista, NE (the local butcher supply shop); Volcanic Peppers in Bellevue, NE
        * - Current butchers: Just Good Meats & Fareway Foods

      Comment

      • RonB
        Club Member
        • Apr 2016
        • 12683
        • Near Richmond VA
        • Weber Performer Deluxe
          SNS
          Pizza insert
          Rotisserie
          Smokenator 1000
          Cookshack Smokette Elite
          2 Thermapens
          Chefalarm
          Dot
          lots of probes.
          CyberQ

        I accidentally drank holy water with my laxatives.

        I’m about to start a religious movement.

        Comment


        • holehogg
          holehogg commented
          Editing a comment
          Holy c..p.
      • Donw
        Club Member
        • Jul 2017
        • 3025

        From my granddaughter.
        How many psychologists does it take to change a light bulb?
        Only one, but the bulb really needs to want to change.

        Comment

        • gcdmd
          Charter Member
          • Sep 2014
          • 1017
          • The Republic of Texas

          Then there's the guy with no arms or legs named Dillon.

          Comment


          • Mr. Bones
            Mr. Bones commented
            Editing a comment
            Floatin on th tide? Bob.

          • BigCountryQ
            BigCountryQ commented
            Editing a comment
            Standing outside of a hole? Phil

          • BigCountryQ
            BigCountryQ commented
            Editing a comment
            Standing inside of a hole? Doug
        • holehogg
          Club Member
          • Nov 2017
          • 2328
          • Port Elizabeth, South Africa

          What do you call one cow spying on another?
          A steak out

          What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
          Nacho cheese

          Comment

          • Willy
            Charter Member
            • Apr 2015
            • 1816
            • High Desert of the Great Southwest

            Click image for larger version

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            Comment

            • Willy
              Charter Member
              • Apr 2015
              • 1816
              • High Desert of the Great Southwest

              Never, NEVER, NEVER,
              under any circumstances,
              take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night!

              Comment


              • Mr. Bones
                Mr. Bones commented
                Editing a comment
                Bad juju!!!!
            • Willy
              Charter Member
              • Apr 2015
              • 1816
              • High Desert of the Great Southwest


              The Maid


              The maid asked for a raise in pay. The wife was upset about this and decided to talk to her about it.

              Wife: "Now, tell me why you think you deserve a pay increase?"

              Maid: Well, there are three reasons why I wanna increase. The first is that I iron better than you."

              Wife: "Who said you iron better than me?"

              Maid: "Your husband said so."

              Wife: "Oh yeah?"

              Maid: "The second reason is that I am a better cook than you."

              Wife: "Nonsense, who said you were a better cook than me?"

              Maid: "Your husband said so."

              Wife, increasingly agitated: "Oh he did, did he?"

              Maid: "The third reason is that I am better at sex than you."

              Wife, really boiling now and through gritted teeth asks, "And did my husband say that as well?"

              Maid: "No Ma'am. The gardener did."

              Wife: "So how much do you want?"








              Comment


              • Mr. Bones
                Mr. Bones commented
                Editing a comment
                I'm seein a distinct possibility of lumps of coal, in somebody's stockin, tonight!
                Lol!
            • RonB
              Club Member
              • Apr 2016
              • 12683
              • Near Richmond VA
              • Weber Performer Deluxe
                SNS
                Pizza insert
                Rotisserie
                Smokenator 1000
                Cookshack Smokette Elite
                2 Thermapens
                Chefalarm
                Dot
                lots of probes.
                CyberQ

              Click image for larger version

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ID:	613803

              Comment

              • Polarbear777
                Club Member
                • Sep 2016
                • 1680

                Just remember that the Mallard reaction only happens when browning the skin on a specific type of waterfowl.

                Comment


                • RonB
                  RonB commented
                  Editing a comment
                  That's a ducky joke...

                • CaptainMike
                  CaptainMike commented
                  Editing a comment
                  That quacked me up!!
              • holehogg
                Club Member
                • Nov 2017
                • 2328
                • Port Elizabeth, South Africa

                Patron in a coffee shop calls the waiter over.
                Patron - "This coffee tastes like mud"
                Waiter - "I know its fresh ground"

                Comment

                Announcement

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                Meat-Up in Memphis 2021

                Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early!
                Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis)
                See more
                See less
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                Meat-Up in Memphis

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