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    Two for Panhead John



    Last edited by ofelles; September 1, 2021, 02:43 PM.

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        Last edited by Ronaldf123; September 1, 2021, 06:50 PM.

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          What's the difference between a literalist and a kleptomaniac?

          A literalist takes things literally.

          A kleptomaniac takes things, literally.

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          • new2smoking
            new2smoking commented
            Editing a comment
            Ah, it's all about the comma! 'Help my Uncle Jack, off the horse.'

            The bar panda who 'Eats, shoots, and leaves.'

          • Foehn Watts
            Foehn Watts commented
            Editing a comment
            Gawd BLESS those commas.

          • wu7y
            wu7y commented
            Editing a comment
            But often a missed comma is not as serious as a missed period.

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              Speaking of commas

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                In case you were looking for an excuse to go vegan

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                • Mr. Bones
                  Mr. Bones commented
                  Editing a comment
                  Rilly Classy

                • Polarbear777
                  Polarbear777 commented
                  Editing a comment
                  "Rumped Roast"

                • Mr. Bones
                  Mr. Bones commented
                  Editing a comment
                  Pre- Made Smash Burgers!!!

                  Pork Section???
                  Pressed Ham, Fo Sho!
                  Last edited by Mr. Bones; September 6, 2021, 03:56 PM.

                We've all seen dogs with their heads out a car window. Dakota likes to poke her nose just over the lip of the sunroof. At 60 mph, I can only imagine the rush of smells coming into her nostrils.
                Last edited by Bogy; September 2, 2021, 12:52 PM.

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                • Bogy
                  Bogy commented
                  Editing a comment
                  Sorry, meant to put this in the "Show your pets" thread, but I got to the "Off topic" section, and my brain went on autopilot. Since this is where I post the most.

                • holehogg
                  holehogg commented
                  Editing a comment
                  Was going to comment with "you can't teach an old dog new tricks" then decided not to as it might be seen as a pet peeve and I'd be scent packing.

                • Mr. Bones
                  Mr. Bones commented
                  Editing a comment
                  Chill with it, if'n ya are, Brother!
                  Reckon th Mods can relocate it, as ya see fit.
                  Totally Cute pic of Dakota, though!!!
                  Last edited by Mr. Bones; September 2, 2021, 08:57 PM. Reason: n

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                • Bogy
                  Bogy commented
                  Editing a comment
                  But lots of fiber!

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                  Two parents were at the playground watching their kids.

                  One says to the other, "I know your son is destined to be a trombone player"
                  The other says, "How can you possibly know that"

                  "Well, he is having trouble with the slide and he can't swing."

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                    • Bogy
                      Bogy commented
                      Editing a comment
                      I'm just going to accept that that's funny, because the reality is too depressing!

                    Had to post it, funny as heck …. My VERY religious cousin sent it to me.

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                      A senior citizen said to his eighty-year old buddy:
                      'So I hear you're getting married?'
                      'Yep!'
                      'Do I know her?
                      'Nope!'
                      'This woman, is she good looking?'
                      'Not really.'
                      'Is she a good cook?'
                      'Naw, she can't cook too well.'
                      'Does she have lots of money?'
                      'Nope! Poor as a church mouse.'
                      'Well, then, is she good in bed?'
                      'I don't know.'
                      'Why in the world do you want to marry her then?'
                      'Because she can still drive!'
                      ----------------------------------------------------
                      Three old guys are out walking.
                      First one says, 'Windy, isn't it?'
                      Second one says, 'No, it's Thursday!'
                      Third one says, 'So am I. Let's go get a beer..'
                      ------------------------------------------------
                      Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical.
                      A few days later, the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
                      A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, 'You're really doing great, aren't you?'
                      Morris replied, 'Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.''
                      The doctor said, 'I didn't say that.. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur; be careful.'
                      ------------------------------------------------
                      A little old man
                      shuffled slowly into an ice cream parlour and pulled himself slowly, painfully, up onto a stool.
                      After catching his breath, he ordered a banana split.
                      The waitress asked kindly, 'Crushed nuts'
                      'No,' he replied, 'Arthritis'

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