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Meat-Up in Memphis 2021

Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early!
Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis)
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  • martybartram
    Former Member
    • Apr 2016
    • 462
    • Vass, NC

    Do comics count as jokes...?
    Click image for larger version

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    Comment


    • richinlbrg
      richinlbrg commented
      Editing a comment
      Of course it does, martybartram !!

      JMHO, if it brings a smile, it is OK!
  • martybartram
    Former Member
    • Apr 2016
    • 462
    • Vass, NC

    I am starting a gunsmithing course next week and received some of the materials yesterday in the mail. I started reading one of the books today and had to share this from it.

    Circumstantial Evidence?
    A dangerous thing, for it can surely be so wrong, Take the case of one of our local gunsmith/farmers. Last winter this guy was out doing the milking of his one and only cow - a beast of dubious character and ornery disposition. He just got things going merrily and the "poing-pwang" of the milk hitting the bucket at the right pitch, when the cowl let fly with a kick that sent the bucket sailing across the barn and the milk spraying over everything in sight. This had been happening too regularly before, and my ingenious friend had his plans all made. He took a spike and nailed the hoof of that cow firmly to the barn floor. Chuckling with evil glee, he went back to the business at hand, patting himself on the back in time with the squirts of the milk. He had not, however, figured on the brain power of his beast. With her other foot she dealt my friend a vicious cross-cutting kick. "Ho! Ho!" quoth he, after wiping off the milk and brown stuff from the floor off his face and clothes, "I have one more nail and the same hammer." So he pried her feet as far apart as he could and nailed the other hoof to the floor. "This will be heaven," he mused, and wink back to milking...messed up but triumphant.
    Now, you who know nothing about cows in the winter do not realize that the fine plume on the end of a cows tail becomes a brown frozen mass in the winter with the weight and heft of a 15 lb sledge hammer. With unerring accuracy, the cow used this weapon to deal our friend a cold-cocking blow to the back of his head just as he had his face buried in the warm flank of her side. In high umbrage - which means he was just madder than seven kinds of hell - he went to the machine shed, got a short step-ladder and a spike. Back at the barn, he pulled that tail up with one hand and reached high overhead to nail the end of it to the overhead beam. Being stretched out like he was, his pants fell down. And just then his wife walked through the barn door. ~ Harold Lofgreen, Montezuma's Postmaster

    Comment

    • Juddlight
      Former Member
      • Jul 2015
      • 184
      • Mid michigan

      Nice bass huskee 😀

      Comment

      • RonB
        Club Member
        • Apr 2016
        • 12133
        • Near Richmond VA
        • Weber Performer Deluxe
          SNS
          Pizza insert
          Rotisserie
          Smokenator 1000
          Cookshack Smokette Elite
          2 Thermapens
          Chefalarm
          Dot
          lots of probes.
          CyberQ

        CAPTION THIS IMAGE!

        We were driving home from vacation last Sat. and stopped at a little place for lunch. While in the restroom, I noticed a number of prints of '40s or '50s style pinups. The one below seemed appropriate for the Pit, so I took a shot of it. I thought it would be fun for everyone to offer captions, but remember - this is a place where anyone might take a peek, so please keep your captions family friendly. If you can't keep it clean, send it to me...

        Click image for larger version

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        Comment


        • gcdmd
          gcdmd commented
          Editing a comment
          http://amazingribs.com/index.html

          Meathead has been using this image on the front page of Amazing Ribs for quite some time, but you're the first one to think of a caption contest.
          Last edited by gcdmd; June 29th, 2016, 09:08 AM.

        • RonB
          RonB commented
          Editing a comment
          It's been so long since I have been to the front page, I forgot this shot was there.
      • martybartram
        Former Member
        • Apr 2016
        • 462
        • Vass, NC

        Seen on twitter: @JusticeWillett

        The doctor has ordered me to lay off the exercise & radically boost my BBQ intake. Unrelatedly, I have begun calling myself "the doctor."

        Comment


        • Huskee
          Huskee commented
          Editing a comment
          Lol
      • richinlbrg
        Founding Member
        • Jul 2014
        • 1845
        • Leesburg, VA. (Northern, VA)
        • We have two weber kettle grills (one LARGE and one small/average), the SnS and the Weber Smokey Mountain 18" smoker. We use both natural lump charcoal and KNB for smoking and measure our temps with a Maverick 733, thermopen and MK4. Favorite beer depends on what is cooking (alt answer is yes).

        Seems appropriate.
        Attached Files

        Comment

        • johnsteen
          Charter Member
          • Jan 2015
          • 244

          six letters

          Comment

          • Huskee
            Pit Boss
            • May 2014
            • 14677
            • central MI, USA
            • Follow me on Instagram, huskeesbarbecue

              Want a free bottle of whiskey? Check out my link to Flaviar.com, you join with it, we both get a $50 bottle free.

              Smokers / Grills
              • Yoder loaded Wichita offset smoker
              • PBC
              • Grilla Silverbac pellet grill
              • Slow 'N Sear Deluxe Kamado (SnSK)
              • Dyna-Glo XL Premium dual chamber charcoal grill
              • Weber 22" Original Kettle Premium (copper)
              • Weber 26" Original Kettle Premium (black)
              • Weber Jumbo Joe Gold (18.5")
              • Weber Smokey Joe Silver (14.5")
              • Brinkmann cabinet charcoal smoker (repurposed)

              Thermometers
              • (3) Maverick XR-50: 4-probe Wireless Thermometers
              • (7) Maverick ET-732s
              • (1) Maverick ET-735 Bluetooth (in box)
              • (1) Smoke by ThermoWorks
              • (1) Signals by ThermoWorks
              • Thermapen MkII, orange
              • ThermoPop, yellow
              • ThermoWorks ChefAlarm
              • Morpilot 6-probe wireless
              • ThermoWorks Infrared IRK2
              • ThermoWorks fridge & freezer therms as well

              Accessories
              • Instant Pot 6qt
              • Anova Bluetooth SV
              • Kitchen Aide mixer & meat grinder attachment
              • Kindling Cracker King (XL)
              • BBQ Dragon
              • Weber full & half chimneys, Char-Broil Half Time chimney
              • Weber grill topper
              • Slow 'N Sear Original, XL, and SnS Charcoal Basket (for Jumbo Joe)
              • Drip 'N Griddle Pan, 22' Easy Spin Grate, and Elevated Cooking grate, by ABCbarbecue
              • Pittsburgh Digital Moisture Meter

              Beverages
              • Favorite summer beer: Leinenkugels Summer & Grapefruit Shandy, Hamm's, Michelob Ultra Pure Gold
              • Fav other beer: DAB, Sam Adams regular, Third Shift amber or Coors Batch 19, Stella Artois
              • Fav cheap beers: Pabst, High Life, Hamm's & Stroh's
              • Most favorite beer: The one in your fridge
              • Wine: Red- big, bold, tannic & peppery- Petite Sirah, Zinfandel, Cabernet Sauv, Sangiovese, Syrah, etc
              • Whiskey: Buffalo Trace, Eagle Rare, E.H. Taylor, Blanton's, Old Forester 1870, Elijah Craig, Basil Hayden's. Neat please.
              • Scotch: Current favorite- The Arran (anything by them), Glenmorangie 12yr Lasanta, sherry cask finished. The Balvenie Double Wood, also like Oban 18yr, and The Glenlivet Nadurra (Oloroso sherry cask finished) among others. Neat please.

              About me
              Real name: Aaron
              Location: Farwell, Michigan- near Clare. (dead center of lower peninsula)

              Occupation:
              • Healthcare- Licensed & Registered Respiratory Therapist (RRT) for MidMichigan Health, a University of Michigan Health System.

            In Scotland, a kilted fella left the pub after a few pints. Well, perhaps a few too many pints by any other standards. Halfway home, stumbling somewhat, en route through the park he saw a grove of trees. He found it beckoning him to have a quick lie down and rest up a bit. Soon the lad was faahhhst asleep and snoring wildly.

            Shortly thereafter two young lassies were walking a dog though the park and heard an awful racket of a man snoring. Even the dog was alarmed. As they neared the poor drunken fellow asleep on the ground, they couldn't help but giggle like the schoolgirls they were at him and his kilt. Being the man was a true Scot, he had only the kilt on. Nothing else underneath. The girls snickered to each other.

            The first young lass lifted the kilt a wee bit, and the two girls giggled even more. The second girl dared her friend to tie one of the small blue bows in here hair around...it. The second girl giggled, blushed, and took the bet. Another lift of the kilt, a quick knot was tied, and the two girls scampered off merrily giggling the rest of the way home.


            When the lad finally awoke a couple hours later, he had to take himself a rather large wee wee. He stumbled off to the woods and as he looked down he was surprised to see the little blue bow!

            [In Scottish accent]
            "Ahh wee lad, I don't know whayre ya been but I see ya won fayrst place!"

            Comment


            • Huskee
              Huskee commented
              Editing a comment
              I was just informed this is in an old song. I didn't know that, I just heard it as a joke couple days ago.

            • DWCowles
              DWCowles commented
              Editing a comment
              Now that's funny even the wife got a chuckle
          • gcdmd
            Charter Member
            • Sep 2014
            • 962
            • The Republic of Texas

            Good News!

            There’s a tasty way
            to enjoy whole
            grains and leafy
            greens!


            Feed them to a cow,
            and they’ll turn
            into a delicious,
            satisfying steak.

            Comment


            • Breadhead
              Breadhead commented
              Editing a comment
              My thoughts exactly...😉

            • Steve Vojtek
              Steve Vojtek commented
              Editing a comment
              Steak is my favorite salad!
          • Tucson Bill
            Former Member
            • Jul 2016
            • 29

            Two young hunters from a Texas University which shall remain unnamed went deer hunting. They bagged a beautiful specimen with a huge rack. Excited about the prize and venison sausage to come they began dragging their kill back to the pickup. It was very slow going since the antlers kept snagging in the underbrush. Eventually they came upon a fellow hunter who suggested that if they pulled by the hind legs then the antlers would part the brush and slip through easily. "Aha!" they cried.

            Hours passed and the fellow came upon the pair again. Noting that they were pulling from the front again, and struggling,he asked "Why are you doing that? I told you what the problem is." One of them replied "It really was much easier to do it the way you suggested, but we just kept getting farther from our truck!"

            Comment

            • RonB
              Club Member
              • Apr 2016
              • 12133
              • Near Richmond VA
              • Weber Performer Deluxe
                SNS
                Pizza insert
                Rotisserie
                Smokenator 1000
                Cookshack Smokette Elite
                2 Thermapens
                Chefalarm
                Dot
                lots of probes.
                CyberQ

              WHEN YOU'RE ALMOST 70...

              I was talking to a young woman in the bar last night.
              She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut,
              you'd look all right.”
              I said, “If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you.”
              Cost me a fat lip but, when you’re almost seventy...who cares?
              **********

              Comment

              • surfdog
                Club Member
                • Mar 2016
                • 915
                • Sunny SoCal
                • Cooking gadgets
                  Weber Summit Charcoal Grill Center
                  Weber Summit Platinum D6
                  Blue Rhino Razor
                  Dyna-Glo XL Premium Dual Chamber
                  Camp Chef Somerset IV along with their Artisan Pizza Oven 90
                  Anova WiFi

                  Thermometers
                  Thermapen Mk4 - ThermaQ High Temp Kit - ThermaQ Meathead Kit - ThermaQ WiFi - ThermoWorks IR-GUN-S - ThermoWorks Signals & Billows - ThermoPop -ThermoWorks ProNeedle - ThermoWorks TimeStick Trio x2 - and a Christopher Kimball timer - NO, I do not work for ThermoWorks...I just like their products.

                  Other useful bits...
                  KitchenAid 7-qt Pro Line stand mixer
                  A Black & Decker food processor that I can't seem to murder
                  A couple of immersion blenders, one a "consumer" model & the other a "high end" Italian thing. Yes, the Italian one is a bit better, but only marginally
                  Instant Pot Duo Evo Plus 8-qt + accessories like egg-bite & egg holders
                  All-Clad pots & pans, along with some cast iron...everything from 7" Skookie pans to 8.5qt Dutch ovens
                  Weber GBS griddle, pizza stone, and wok
                  Knives range from Mercer to F. Dick to "You spent how much for one knife? One knife?!" LOL

                A guy walks into a pub wearing his teams colours, jersey and all.
                It quickly becomes clear that he's in a rival teams bar...
                The barman quickly calls him over..."No sense in trying to sneak out now, you've already been seen."
                "So now what?" asks the man.
                "We'll play a little game... You roll the die and if you get a 1 through 5...some of the lads will take you out back and rough you up."
                "And if I get a six?" he asks hopefully.
                "Well then you get a free roll don't ya!"

                Comment

                • barryluft
                  Former Member
                  • Jan 2015
                  • 3
                  • Vancouver Island Canada

                  What did one cannibal say to the other...

                  "You're too late for dinner, everyone's ate!"

                  Comment

                  • MBMorgan
                    Club Member
                    • Sep 2015
                    • 6034
                    • Colorado
                    • > Weber Genesis EP-330
                      > Grilla Grills Original Grilla (OG) pellet smoker
                      > Pit Barrel Cooker (gone to a new home)
                      > WeberQ 2000 (on "loan" to a relative)
                      > Old Smokey Electric (for chickens mostly - when it's too nasty out
                      to fiddle with a more capable cooker)
                      > Luhr Jensen Little Chief Electric - Top Loader circa 1990 (smoked fish & jerky)
                      > Thermoworks Smoke
                      > 3 Thermoworks Chef Alarms
                      > Thermoworks Thermapen
                      > Thermoworks IR-GUN-S
                      > Anova sous vide circulator
                      > Searzall torch
                      > BBQ Guru Rib Ring

                      > Favorite Beer: Guinness Extra Stout, Fat Tire, Anchor Steam, or Alaskan Amber
                      > Favorite Wine: Klinker Brick Old Ghost Zinfandel or Matetic Corralillo Winemaker's Blend
                      > Favorite Whiskey: Balvenie Double Wood Scotch or Jameson Irish

                    Found on the interwebs:

                    Click image for larger version

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                    Comment


                    • richinlbrg
                      richinlbrg commented
                      Editing a comment
                      THAT IS GREAT!!!!

                      Thank you, I am stealing it, Mbmorgan !
                  • richinlbrg
                    Founding Member
                    • Jul 2014
                    • 1845
                    • Leesburg, VA. (Northern, VA)
                    • We have two weber kettle grills (one LARGE and one small/average), the SnS and the Weber Smokey Mountain 18" smoker. We use both natural lump charcoal and KNB for smoking and measure our temps with a Maverick 733, thermopen and MK4. Favorite beer depends on what is cooking (alt answer is yes).

                    Fitting for today!
                    Attached Files

                    Comment

                    Announcement

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                    Meat-Up in Memphis 2021

                    Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early!
                    Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis)
                    See more
                    See less
                    Working...
                    X
                    Meat-Up in Memphis

                    T-Shirts & More T-Shirts & More
                    Order men's and women's T-Shirts, Sweatshirts, Aprons, Mugs, Caps, Tote Bags, Flasks, and more, all imprinted with the Pitmaster Club logo. There's even a spiral bound journal where you can make notes on your cooks.

                    Cool Embroidered Shirt Cool Embroidered Shirt
                    This beautifully embroidered shirt is the same one Meathead wears in public and on TV. It's wash and wear and doesn't need ironing (really!), but it is a soft cottonlike feel. Choice of four colors and both men's and women's.

                    Click here for more info.

                    Support ARC

                    Many merchants pay us a small referral fee when you click our links and purchase from them. On Amazon it works on everything from grills to diapers, they never tell us what you bought, and it has zero impact on the price you pay, but has a major impact on our ability to improve this site! And remember, we only recommend products we love. If you like AmazingRibs.com, please save this link and use it every time you go to Amazon.

                    https://tinyurl.com/amazingribs

                    BBQ Stars

                    Spotlight

                    These are not ads or paid placements. These Are Some Of Our Favorite Tools And Toys.

                    These are products we have tested, won our top awards, and are highly recommend. Click here to read how we test, about our medals, and what they mean.

                    Use our links when you buy things

                    Many merchants pay us a small referral fee when you click our links and purchase from them. On Amazon it works on everything from grills to diapers, they never tell us what you bought, it has zero impact on the price you pay, but has a major impact on our ability to improve this site! If you like AmazingRibs.com, please save this link and use it every time you go to Amazon

                    https://tinyurl.com/amazingribs

                     


                    Placeholder

                    Surely you know somebody who loves outdoor cooking who deserves a gift for the holidays, birthday, anniversary, or just for being wonderful. There he is, right in the mirror! Here are our selections of best ideas, all Platinum or Gold Medalists, listed by price.

                    Click here to see our list of Gold Medal Gifts


                    Digital Thermometers Are Your Most Valuable Tool And Here's A Great Buy!

                    maverick PT55 thermometer

                    A good digital thermometer keeps you from serving dry overcooked food or dangerously undercooked food. They are much faster and much more accurate than dial thermometers. YOU NEED ONE!

                    Click here for more info on the Maverick PT-55 Waterproof Instant-Read Thermometer Review shown above. It may be the best value in a thermometer out there


                    If you have a Weber Kettle, you need the Slow 'N' Sear

                    slow n sear

                    The Slow 'N' Sear turns your grill into a first class smoker and also creates an extremely hot sear zone you can use to create steakhouse steaks.

                    Click here for our article on this breakthrough tool


                    Bring The Heat With Broil King Signet's Dual Tube Burners

                    the good one grill

                    The Broil King Signet 320 is a modestly priced, 3-burner gas grill that packs a lot of value and power under the hood. Broil King's proprietary, dual-tube burners get hot fast and are able to achieve high, searing temps that rival most comparatively priced gas grills. The quality cast aluminum housing carries a Limited Lifetime Warranty.

                    Click here to read our complete review


                    The Good-One Is A Superb Grill And A Superb Smoker All In One

                    the good one grill

                    The Good-One Open Range is a charcoal grill with an offset smoke chamber attached. It is dramatically different from a traditional offset smoker. The grill sits low in front and doubles as a firebox for the smoke chamber which is spliced on above and behind so it can work like a horizontal offset smoker only better. By placing the heat source behind and under the smokebox instead of off to the side, Open Range produces even temperature from left to right, something almost impossible to achieve with a standard barrel shaped offset.

                    Click here to read our complete review


                    Pit Barrel Cooker Smoker

                    Griddle And Deep Fryer All In One

                    The flat top does the burgers and the fryer does the fries. Use the griddle for bacon, eggs, and home fries. Or pancakes, fajitas, grilled cheese, you name it. Why stink up the house deep frying and spatter all over? Do your fried chicken and calamari outside. Blackstone's Rangetop Combo With Deep Fryer does it all. Plus it has a built in cutting board, garbage bag holder, and paper towel holder. An additional work table on the left side provides plenty of counter space.

                    Click here to read our detailed review and to order


                    Pit Barrel Cooker Smoker

                    The Pit Barrel Cooker May Be Too Easy

                    The PBC has a rabid cult following for good reason. It is absolutely positively without a doubt the best bargain on a smoker in the world. Period. This baby will cook circles around the cheap offset sideways barrel smokers in the hardware stores because temperature control is so much easier. Best of all, it is only $299 delivered to your door!

                    Click here to read our detailed review and the raves from people who own them


                    The Undisputed Champion!

                    thermapen

                    The Thermoworks Thermapen MK4 is considered by the pros, and our team, to be the single best instant read thermometer. Don't accept cheap substitutes.  Click here to read our test results and comprehensive review and why it won our Platinum Medal .


                    Compact Powerful Sear Machine For Your Next Tailgater

                    Placeholder

                    Char-Broil's Grill2Go x200 is a super-portable, fun little sizzler made of heavy, rust-proof cast aluminum. The lid snaps shut. Grab the handle and you're off to the party! Char-Broil's TRU-Infrared design produces searing heat while reducing fuel consumption. A 16 ounce LP gas canister is enough to keep you flipping burgers for hours.

                    Click here to read our detailed review and to order


                    The Cool Kettle With The Hinged Hood We Always Wanted

                    NK-22-Ck Grill

                    Their NK22CK-C Charcoal Kettle Grill puts a few spins on the familiar kettle design. In fact, the hinged lid with a handle on the front, spins in a rotary motion 180 degrees. It's hard to beat a Weber kettle, but Napoleon holds its own and adds some unique features to make the NK22CK-C a viable alternative.

                    Click here for more about what makes this grill special


                    Placeholder

                    G&F Suede Welder's Gloves

                    Heat Resistant Gloves With Extra Long Sleeves Hold The Hot Stuff

                    If you're using oven mitts at the grill, it's time to trade up. Say hello to these suede welder's gloves. They're heat resistant enough to handle hot grill grates, and flexible enough to handle tongs. The extra long sleeves even let you reach deep into the firebox to move hot logs without getting burned. Our Fave.

                    Click here to read our detailed review

                    Click here to order from Amazon


                    GrillGrates Take Gas Grills To The Infrared Zone

                    grill grates

                    GrillGrates(TM) amplify heat, prevent flareups, make flipping foods easier, keep small foods from committing suicide, kill hotspots, are easier to clean, flip over to make a fine griddle, and can be easily removed and moved from one grill to another. You can even throw wood chips, pellets, or sawdust between the rails and deliver a quick burst of smoke to whatever is above. Every gas grill needs them.

                    Click here for more about what makes these grates so special


                    PK 360 grill

                    Is This Superb Charcoal Grill A Kamado Killer?

                    The PK-360, with 360 square inches of cooking space, this rust free, cast aluminum charcoal grill is durable and easy to use. Four-way venting means it's easy to set up for two zone cooking with more control than single vent Kamado grills. It is much easier to set up for 2-zone cooking than any round kamado. Beautifully designed and completely portable. Meathead says it is his preferrred grill.

                    Click here to read our detailed review of the PK 360

                    Click here to order it direct from PK and get a special deal for AmazingRibs.com readers only


                    kareubequ bbq smoker

                    Our Favorite Backyard Smoker

                    The amazing Karubecue is the most innovative smoker in the world. The quality of meat from this machine is astonishing. At its crux is a patented firebox that burns logs above the cooking chamber and sucks heat and extremely clean blue smoke into the thermostat controlled oven. It is our favorite smoker, period.

                    Click here for our review of this superb smoker


                    Masterbuilt MPS 340/G ThermoTemp XL Propane Smoker

                    masterbuilt gas smoker

                    The First Propane Smoker With A Thermostat Makes This Baby Foolproof

                    Set ThermoTemp's dial from 175° to 350°F and the thermostat inside will adjust the burner just like an indoor kitchen oven. All you need to do is add wood to the tray above the burner to start smokin'.

                    Click here to read our detailed review


                    Fireboard: The Ultimate Top Of The Line BBQ Thermometer

                    fireboard bbq thermometer

                    With the ability to monitor up to six temperatures simultaneously with either Bluetooth or Wifi on your mobile phone, tablet, or computer, Fireboard is the best digital thermometer we’ve tested.

                    Click here to read our detailed review


                    Finally, A Great Portable Pellet Smoker

                    Green Mountain Davey Crockett Grill

                    Green Mountain's portable Davy Crockett Pellet Smoker is one mean tailgating and picnic machine. But it's also gaining popularity with people who want to add a small, set it and forget it pellet smoker to their backyard arsenal. And with their WiFi capabilities you can control and monitor Davy Crocket from your smart phone or laptop.

                    Click here to read our detailed review and to order