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    • ecowper
      ecowper commented
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      Huskee I’m a second order vegan

    • Bogy
      Bogy commented
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      I have several vegans in my freezer!

    • Thunder77
      Thunder77 commented
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      😂😂😂

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      A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young female student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath...

      "Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

      Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."

      He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"

      Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls back the covers.

      She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.

      She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."

      The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly, "Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very, very, closely:
      "Are - my - test - results - back?"

      Comment


      • Bogy
        Bogy commented
        Editing a comment
        My wife liked that one almost as much as me!

      So...I was gonna make a joke about sodium...but Na.
      Last edited by surfdog; April 4, 2020, 06:48 PM.

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      • JCGrill
        JCGrill commented
        Editing a comment
        D'oh!

      • fkrall
        fkrall commented
        Editing a comment
        It took me a second.....

      I need 2 favors.

      1) Someone change my Amazon password and don't tell me what it is.

      2) Someone nail the pantry door shut.
      Thank you.

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      • Thunder77
        Thunder77 commented
        Editing a comment
        🤣🤣🤣

      • TJMagneto
        TJMagneto commented
        Editing a comment
        How about hiding your TP at my house. I'll take good care of it.

      So you Maryland residents, or anyone who knows a Bawlmer native will get this

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      • Donw
        Donw commented
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        Going to grab me a natty boh and a coddie and go downy the ocean hon to corn teen.

      • Thunder77
        Thunder77 commented
        Editing a comment
        LOL! Downy oshin is a great place to corn teen!

      • Donw
        Donw commented
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        Yall up in Bawlmer remember to worsh your hands with soap and woter. Doctor says theres a varse going round.🙂
        Last edited by Donw; April 5, 2020, 08:23 AM.

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      • ofelles
        ofelles commented
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        Obviously you don't live in California. Still over $3/gallon, not by much but still

      • Bogy
        Bogy commented
        Editing a comment
        ofelles, another good reason to live in Iowa instead of California. Although I'm sad our 'once in three year' trip this month had to be canceled.

      • Huskee
        Huskee commented
        Editing a comment
        I only drive 6 mi one way to work, avg of 3 trips/wk, so my truck does well on low mileage & low fuel use. My wife's Acadia however, I swear she'd go through a tank every 3 days. Been 3 weeks and it's still at 3/4 tank.

      I just got hired by a company that makes bicycle wheels!
      I'm the spokesperson....

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      • Foehn Watts
        Foehn Watts commented
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        Do they have you rollin' around town pedaling stuff yet?

      • Thunder77
        Thunder77 commented
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        Not yet! 🤣

      My wife rewrote the calendar for April to be more accurate

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      • Bogy
        Bogy commented
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        One of my granddaughters just got set up with Messenger for Kids account. She called me this morning and was excited that on May 5 she was going to be able to go back to school (first grader). This afternoon the governor of Washington announced school was done for the year. Not a surprise to me, but terribly disappointing for her. Might have been more disappointing than our trip next week to Disneyland getting cancelled. No, probably not.

      • ecowper
        ecowper commented
        Editing a comment
        Bogy yes, cancelling the school year in WA is painful. My wife and I were going to London this coming weekend and that, obviously, is cancelled. :-(

      • Huskee
        Huskee commented
        Editing a comment
        I do the arrows thing too.

      I don't know where this is, but when I find out I'm moving there! Click image for larger version

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        My wife asked me why I was speaking so softly at home.
        I told her I was afraid Mark Zuckerberg was listening!

        She laughed. I laughed.

        Alexa laughed. Siri laughed.

        Comment


        • Bogy
          Bogy commented
          Editing a comment
          I have an Alexa dot. It's packed in a box, disconnected, in a box at our lake house. But, my wife and I still have our phones. Many years ago we had Earth Shoes, and liked them. The company went out of business, but recently somebody restarted the earth shoe brand and concept. A few days ago my wife showed me some she was going to order on her computer, I turned around, checked something on my phone, and there was an ad for Earth Shoes.

        • Donw
          Donw commented
          Editing a comment
          I remember Earth Shoes from the early 70’s.

        • DesertRaider
          DesertRaider commented
          Editing a comment
          Steve R. Funny, and true. Scary true.

          Bogy Once we get this virus thing taken care of, we really need to get the whole privacy stuff sorted. I'm thinking about starting a tin foil hat business at this rate.

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        • Mr. Bones
          Mr. Bones commented
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          That's a Classic; Smokey has brought me many such gifts, an let some live critters loose in th house. Of course, I know it's because he loves me, but catchin a really freaked out, an injured bird ain't no easy thing!

        • Bogy
          Bogy commented
          Editing a comment
          Mr. Bones, our Smokey caught a mouse in the garage last week, and brought it in to share. He's got half a dozen fake ones he likes to play fetch with, some are pretty realistic. I've had a few times I thought one of those was real. This time, I thought it was one of his toys. Then I realized it was a little to realistic. He could not understand where it disappeared to.

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            • Mr. Bones
              Mr. Bones commented
              Editing a comment
              Lol, that's hilarious, no hesitation, whatsoever!!!

            • Steve R.
              Steve R. commented
              Editing a comment
              Mr. Bones, my wife couldn't understand why I got the joke immediately and she had to watch it a couple of times. lol

            • Mr. Bones
              Mr. Bones commented
              Editing a comment
              Lol, hope ya gotta a nice prime steak coverin that black eye!

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