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Meat-Up in Memphis 2020

Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early! Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis2020)
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  • Neris
    Club Member
    • Dec 2018
    • 155
    • Dublin, Ireland (europe)

    Anna had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her and urging her to get back out into the world.

    Finally, Anna said she'd go out,but didn't know anyone.

    Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom! I have someone for you to meet."

    Well, it was an immediate hit. They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend away

    Their first night there, she undressed as he did.

    There she stood nude, except for a pair of black lacy panties; he was in his birthday suit.

    Looking her over, he asked, "Why the black panties?"

    She replied: "My breasts you can fondle,my body is yours to explore, but down there I am still mourning."

    He knew he was not getting lucky that night.

    The following night was the same--she stood there wearing the black panties, and he was in his birthday suit--but now he was wearing a black condom.

    She looked at him and asked: " What's with the black condom?"

    He replied, "I want to offer my deepest condolences."

    Comment


    • Huskee
      Huskee commented
      Editing a comment
      Let's keep this family friendly, please. No more racy jokes of this sort. Thank you.
  • surfdog
    Club Member
    • Mar 2016
    • 785
    • Sunny SoCal
    • Cooking gadgets
      Weber Summit Charcoal Grill Center
      Weber Summit Platinum D6
      Blue Rhino Razor
      Dyna-Glo XL Premium Dual Chamber
      Camp Chef Somerset IV along with their Artisan Pizza Oven 90
      Anova WiFi

      Thermometers
      Thermapen Mk4 - ThermaQ High Temp Kit - ThermaQ Meathead Kit - ThermaQ WiFi - ThermoWorks IR-GUN-S - ThermoPop -ThermoWorks ProNeedle - ThermoWorks TimeStick Trio x2 - and a Christopher Kimball timer - NO, I do not work for ThermoWorks...I just like their products.

      Other useful bits...
      KitchenAid 7-qt Pro Line stand mixer
      A Black & Decker food processor that I can't seem to murder
      A couple of immersion blenders, one a "consumer" model & the other a "high end" Italian thing. Yes, the Italian one is a bit better, but only marginally
      Instant Pot Duo Evo Plus 8-qt + accessories like egg-bite & egg holders
      All-Clad pots & pans, along with some cast iron...everything from 7" Skookie pans to 8-qt Dutch ovens
      Weber GBS griddle & pizza stone
      Knives range from Mercer to F. Dick to "You spent how much for one knife? One knife?!" LOL

    So this guy walks into a Manchester United supporters pub wearing Manchester City colours.

    The whole place went silent.

    The barman tells the guy that he’s made a huge mistake...but all is not lost.
    He says, “Here’s what were gonna do... You’re going to roll this die and if it’s a 1 through 5...a couple of the lads are going to take you out back and give you a beating. After that, we’re all good and you can drink here like a local.”

    Nevevously that guy says, “Um...ok...but what if I roll a 6”

    The barman replies, “Well, you get a free roll then don’t ya!”

    Comment

    • surfdog
      Club Member
      • Mar 2016
      • 785
      • Sunny SoCal
      • Cooking gadgets
        Weber Summit Charcoal Grill Center
        Weber Summit Platinum D6
        Blue Rhino Razor
        Dyna-Glo XL Premium Dual Chamber
        Camp Chef Somerset IV along with their Artisan Pizza Oven 90
        Anova WiFi

        Thermometers
        Thermapen Mk4 - ThermaQ High Temp Kit - ThermaQ Meathead Kit - ThermaQ WiFi - ThermoWorks IR-GUN-S - ThermoPop -ThermoWorks ProNeedle - ThermoWorks TimeStick Trio x2 - and a Christopher Kimball timer - NO, I do not work for ThermoWorks...I just like their products.

        Other useful bits...
        KitchenAid 7-qt Pro Line stand mixer
        A Black & Decker food processor that I can't seem to murder
        A couple of immersion blenders, one a "consumer" model & the other a "high end" Italian thing. Yes, the Italian one is a bit better, but only marginally
        Instant Pot Duo Evo Plus 8-qt + accessories like egg-bite & egg holders
        All-Clad pots & pans, along with some cast iron...everything from 7" Skookie pans to 8-qt Dutch ovens
        Weber GBS griddle & pizza stone
        Knives range from Mercer to F. Dick to "You spent how much for one knife? One knife?!" LOL

      Ol’ Bill went to see his doctor for his annual checkup...

      In the course of it he asked if would would live to be a hundred.

      The doctor asked, “Do you drink or smoke cigars?”
      ”No,” Bill says.

      ”Do you gamble? You know, bet on the horses...play cards...that sort of thing?”
      Again, “No.”

      ”Do you spend hours in the cold hunting or fishing?”
      ”Nope,” he says.

      ”Do you stay up late carousing with women?”
      ”Oh gosh no!,” says Bill.

      Finally the doctor asks, “Then why the heck do you want to live to a hundred?”

      Comment

      • Neris
        Club Member
        • Dec 2018
        • 155
        • Dublin, Ireland (europe)

        [Edited by Huskee]

        Comment


        • DesertRaider
          DesertRaider commented
          Editing a comment
          That wasn't funny, that was mean. I won't go on a rant, but to me, this doesn't fly.

        • Huskee
          Huskee commented
          Editing a comment
          OK, this is crosses the line. Keep in mind our forum rules and no more jokes of this type, please.
      • Neris
        Club Member
        • Dec 2018
        • 155
        • Dublin, Ireland (europe)

        Paddy's dog died, he took it to the local Catholic church. He asked the preacher if he could have a funeral service for his much loved pet, but the preacher explained that they didn't do services like that for animals. Paddy asked who would and the preacher suggested that the Baptist church up the road would probably give the dog a funeral service. Paddy asked, "Preacher, do you think $5,000 would be enough payment for the dog's funeral?" The preacher relied, "Dearest Paddy, why didn't you tell me that your dog was a Catholic?

        Comment

        • ofelles
          Club Member
          • Jun 2018
          • 1211
          • Brentwood CA
          • Yoder YS640 on Comp cart
            Klose 20x42 Charcoal Grill
            LSG Insulated Cabinet (coming in April)
            Jumbo Joe
            VacMaster Pro 380 sealer
            FireBoard and Fan
            Thermoworks Signal
            Thermoworks Dot
            Thermopen Mk4

          Comment


          • HawkerXP
            HawkerXP commented
            Editing a comment
            in a snow storm.

          • holehogg
            holehogg commented
            Editing a comment
            Empty promises

          • gcdmd
            gcdmd commented
            Editing a comment
            Another one crossed the line.
        • frigate
          Club Member
          • Aug 2019
          • 55
          • East Quogue, NY

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          Comment

          • frigate
            Club Member
            • Aug 2019
            • 55
            • East Quogue, NY

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            • frigate
              Club Member
              • Aug 2019
              • 55
              • East Quogue, NY

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              Comment

              • ofelles
                Club Member
                • Jun 2018
                • 1211
                • Brentwood CA
                • Yoder YS640 on Comp cart
                  Klose 20x42 Charcoal Grill
                  LSG Insulated Cabinet (coming in April)
                  Jumbo Joe
                  VacMaster Pro 380 sealer
                  FireBoard and Fan
                  Thermoworks Signal
                  Thermoworks Dot
                  Thermopen Mk4

                A group that mastered the art of funny puns, is the Indian Hills Community of Colorado, who’ve been making regular punny roadside signage to the delight of everyone… two whit:


                The man behind the jokes is Colorado native and volunteer at the community center, Vince Rozmiarek. He made his first sign as an April Fools prank and has never looked back.

                “It is hard to keep coming up with material, but I do try.”


                Comment

                • ofelles
                  Club Member
                  • Jun 2018
                  • 1211
                  • Brentwood CA
                  • Yoder YS640 on Comp cart
                    Klose 20x42 Charcoal Grill
                    LSG Insulated Cabinet (coming in April)
                    Jumbo Joe
                    VacMaster Pro 380 sealer
                    FireBoard and Fan
                    Thermoworks Signal
                    Thermoworks Dot
                    Thermopen Mk4

                  I will never hear church bells ringing again without smiling…

                  Upon hearing that her elderly grandfather had just passed away, Katie went straight to her grandparent's house to visit her 95 year-old grandmother and comfort her.

                  When she asked how her grandfather had died, her grandmother replied, "He had a heart attack while we were making love on Sunday morning."

                  Horrified, Katie told her grandmother that two people nearly 100 years old having sex would surely be asking for trouble.

                  "Oh no, my dear," replied granny. "Many years ago, realizing our advanced age, we figured out the best time to do it was when the church bells would start to ring. It was just the right rhythm. Nice and slow and even. Nothing too strenuous, simply in on the Ding and out on the Dong." She paused to wipe away a tear, and continued, "He'd still be alive if the ice cream truck hadn't come along."

                  Comment

                  • Red Man
                    Club Member
                    • May 2018
                    • 738
                    • Western Washington

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                    Comment

                    • RonB
                      Club Member
                      • Apr 2016
                      • 11406
                      • Near Richmond VA
                      • Weber Performer Deluxe
                        SNS
                        Pizza insert
                        Rotisserie
                        Smokenator 1000
                        Cookshack Smokette Elite
                        2 Thermapens
                        Chefalarm
                        Dot
                        lots of probes.
                        CyberQ

                      On Monday we start Diarrhea Awareness Week.

                      Runs until Friday.

                      Comment


                      • Henrik
                        Henrik commented
                        Editing a comment
                        Ha ha ha!

                      • JimLinebarger
                        JimLinebarger commented
                        Editing a comment
                        Is it for adults only, not for little squirts?
                    • surfdog
                      Club Member
                      • Mar 2016
                      • 785
                      • Sunny SoCal
                      • Cooking gadgets
                        Weber Summit Charcoal Grill Center
                        Weber Summit Platinum D6
                        Blue Rhino Razor
                        Dyna-Glo XL Premium Dual Chamber
                        Camp Chef Somerset IV along with their Artisan Pizza Oven 90
                        Anova WiFi

                        Thermometers
                        Thermapen Mk4 - ThermaQ High Temp Kit - ThermaQ Meathead Kit - ThermaQ WiFi - ThermoWorks IR-GUN-S - ThermoPop -ThermoWorks ProNeedle - ThermoWorks TimeStick Trio x2 - and a Christopher Kimball timer - NO, I do not work for ThermoWorks...I just like their products.

                        Other useful bits...
                        KitchenAid 7-qt Pro Line stand mixer
                        A Black & Decker food processor that I can't seem to murder
                        A couple of immersion blenders, one a "consumer" model & the other a "high end" Italian thing. Yes, the Italian one is a bit better, but only marginally
                        Instant Pot Duo Evo Plus 8-qt + accessories like egg-bite & egg holders
                        All-Clad pots & pans, along with some cast iron...everything from 7" Skookie pans to 8-qt Dutch ovens
                        Weber GBS griddle & pizza stone
                        Knives range from Mercer to F. Dick to "You spent how much for one knife? One knife?!" LOL

                      A recent article in the Daily Post reported that a man, Dave Harper, has sued St. Paul’s Hospital, saying that after his wife had surgery there, she lost all interest in him and they’ve not been intimate since.

                      A hospital spokesman replied: “Mrs. Harper was admitted for cataract surgery. All we did was correct her eyesight.”

                      Comment

                      • Mosca
                        Charter Member
                        • Oct 2014
                        • 2841
                        • PA
                        • Large Big Green Egg, Weber Performer Deluxe, Weber Smokey Joe Silver, Maverick 732, DigiQ, and too much other stuff to mention.

                        Click image for larger version

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                        Comment

                      Announcement

                      Collapse

                      Meat-Up in Memphis 2020

                      Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early! Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis2020)
                      See more
                      See less
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                      Meat-Up in Memphis

                      T-Shirts & More T-Shirts & More
                      Order men's and women's T-Shirts, Sweatshirts, Aprons, Mugs, Caps, Tote Bags, Flasks, and more, all imprinted with the Pitmaster Club logo. There's even a spiral bound journal where you can make notes on your cooks.

                      Cool Embroidered Shirt Cool Embroidered Shirt
                      This beautifully embroidered shirt is the same one Meathead wears in public and on TV. It's wash and wear and doesn't need ironing (really!), but it is a soft cottonlike feel. Choice of four colors and both men's and women's.

                      Click here for more info.

                      Support ARC

                      Many merchants pay us a small referral fee when you click our links and purchase from them. On Amazon it works on everything from grills to diapers, they never tell us what you bought, and it has zero impact on the price you pay, but has a major impact on our ability to improve this site! And remember, we only recommend products we love. If you like AmazingRibs.com, please save this link and use it every time you go to Amazon.

                      https://tinyurl.com/amazingribs

                      BBQ Stars

                      Spotlight

                      These are not ads or paid placements. These Are Some Of Our Favorite Tools And Toys.

                      These are products we have tested, won our top awards, and are highly recommend. Click here to read how we test, about our medals, and what they mean.

                      Use our links when you buy things

                      Many merchants pay us a small referral fee when you click our links and purchase from them. On Amazon it works on everything from grills to diapers, they never tell us what you bought, it has zero impact on the price you pay, but has a major impact on our ability to improve this site! If you like AmazingRibs.com, please save this link and use it every time you go to Amazon

                      https://tinyurl.com/amazingribs

                       


                      Placeholder

                      Surely you know somebody who loves outdoor cooking who deserves a gift for the holidays, birthday, anniversary, or just for being wonderful. There he is, right in the mirror! Here are our selections of best ideas, all Platinum or Gold Medalists, listed by price.

                      Click here to see our list of Gold Medal Gifts


                      Digital Thermometers Are Your Most Valuable Tool And Here's A Great Buy!

                      maverick PT55 thermometer

                      A good digital thermometer keeps you from serving dry overcooked food or dangerously undercooked food. They are much faster and much more accurate than dial thermometers. YOU NEED ONE!

                      Click here for more info on the Maverick PT-55 Waterproof Instant-Read Thermometer Review shown above. It may be the best value in a thermometer out there


                      If you have a Weber Kettle, you need the Slow 'N' Sear

                      slow n sear

                      The Slow 'N' Sear turns your grill into a first class smoker and also creates an extremely hot sear zone you can use to create steakhouse steaks.

                      Click here for our article on this breakthrough tool


                      Bring The Heat With Broil King Signet's Dual Tube Burners

                      the good one grill

                      The Broil King Signet 320 is a modestly priced, 3-burner gas grill that packs a lot of value and power under the hood. Broil King's proprietary, dual-tube burners get hot fast and are able to achieve high, searing temps that rival most comparatively priced gas grills. The quality cast aluminum housing carries a Limited Lifetime Warranty.

                      Click here to read our complete review


                      The Good-One Is A Superb Grill And A Superb Smoker All In One

                      the good one grill

                      The Good-One Open Range is a charcoal grill with an offset smoke chamber attached. It is dramatically different from a traditional offset smoker. The grill sits low in front and doubles as a firebox for the smoke chamber which is spliced on above and behind so it can work like a horizontal offset smoker only better. By placing the heat source behind and under the smokebox instead of off to the side, Open Range produces even temperature from left to right, something almost impossible to achieve with a standard barrel shaped offset.

                      Click here to read our complete review


                      Pit Barrel Cooker Smoker

                      Griddle And Deep Fryer All In One

                      The flat top does the burgers and the fryer does the fries. Use the griddle for bacon, eggs, and home fries. Or pancakes, fajitas, grilled cheese, you name it. Why stink up the house deep frying and spatter all over? Do your fried chicken and calamari outside. Blackstone's Rangetop Combo With Deep Fryer does it all. Plus it has a built in cutting board, garbage bag holder, and paper towel holder. An additional work table on the left side provides plenty of counter space.

                      Click here to read our detailed review and to order


                      Pit Barrel Cooker Smoker

                      The Pit Barrel Cooker May Be Too Easy

                      The PBC has a rabid cult following for good reason. It is absolutely positively without a doubt the best bargain on a smoker in the world. Period. This baby will cook circles around the cheap offset sideways barrel smokers in the hardware stores because temperature control is so much easier. Best of all, it is only $299 delivered to your door!

                      Click here to read our detailed review and the raves from people who own them


                      The Undisputed Champion!

                      thermapen

                      The Thermoworks Thermapen MK4 is considered by the pros, and our team, to be the single best instant read thermometer. Don't accept cheap substitutes.  Click here to read our test results and comprehensive review and why it won our Platinum Medal .


                      Compact Powerful Sear Machine For Your Next Tailgater

                      Placeholder

                      Char-Broil's Grill2Go x200 is a super-portable, fun little sizzler made of heavy, rust-proof cast aluminum. The lid snaps shut. Grab the handle and you're off to the party! Char-Broil's TRU-Infrared design produces searing heat while reducing fuel consumption. A 16 ounce LP gas canister is enough to keep you flipping burgers for hours.

                      Click here to read our detailed review and to order


                      The Cool Kettle With The Hinged Hood We Always Wanted

                      NK-22-Ck Grill

                      Their NK22CK-C Charcoal Kettle Grill puts a few spins on the familiar kettle design. In fact, the hinged lid with a handle on the front, spins in a rotary motion 180 degrees. It's hard to beat a Weber kettle, but Napoleon holds its own and adds some unique features to make the NK22CK-C a viable alternative.

                      Click here for more about what makes this grill special


                      Placeholder

                      G&F Suede Welder's Gloves

                      Heat Resistant Gloves With Extra Long Sleeves Hold The Hot Stuff

                      If you're using oven mitts at the grill, it's time to trade up. Say hello to these suede welder's gloves. They're heat resistant enough to handle hot grill grates, and flexible enough to handle tongs. The extra long sleeves even let you reach deep into the firebox to move hot logs without getting burned. Our Fave.

                      Click here to read our detailed review

                      Click here to order from Amazon


                      GrillGrates Take Gas Grills To The Infrared Zone

                      grill grates

                      GrillGrates(TM) amplify heat, prevent flareups, make flipping foods easier, keep small foods from committing suicide, kill hotspots, are easier to clean, flip over to make a fine griddle, and can be easily removed and moved from one grill to another. You can even throw wood chips, pellets, or sawdust between the rails and deliver a quick burst of smoke to whatever is above. Every gas grill needs them.

                      Click here for more about what makes these grates so special


                      kareubequ bbq smoker

                      Our Favorite Backyard Smoker

                      The amazing Karubecue is the most innovative smoker in the world. The quality of meat from this machine is astonishing. At its crux is a patented firebox that burns logs above the cooking chamber and sucks heat and extremely clean blue smoke into the thermostat controlled oven. It is our favorite smoker, period.

                      Click here for our review of this superb smoker


                      Masterbuilt MPS 340/G ThermoTemp XL Propane Smoker

                      masterbuilt gas smoker

                      The First Propane Smoker With A Thermostat Makes This Baby Foolproof

                      Set ThermoTemp's dial from 175° to 350°F and the thermostat inside will adjust the burner just like an indoor kitchen oven. All you need to do is add wood to the tray above the burner to start smokin'.

                      Click here to read our detailed review


                      Professional Steakhouse Knife Set

                      masterbuilt gas smoker

                      Our founder, Meathead, wanted the same steak knives used by steakhouses such as Peter Luger, Smith & Wollensky, Morton's, Kobe Club, Palm, and many others. So he located the manufacturer and had them stamp our name on some. They boast pointed, temper-ground, serrated, high-carbon stainless-steel, half-tang blades with excellent cutting edge ability. The beefy hardwood handle provides a comfortable grip secured by three hefty rivets. He has machine washed his more than 100 times. They have never rusted and they stay shiny without polishing. Please note that we do not make, sell, or distribute these knives, they just engrave them with our name.

                      Click here to read our detailed review and to order


                      PK 360 grill

                      Is This Superb Charcoal Grill A Kamado Killer?

                      The PK-360, with 360 square inches of cooking space, this rust free, cast aluminum charcoal grill is durable and easy to use. Four-way venting means it's easy to set up for two zone cooking with more control than single vent Kamado grills. It is much easier to set up for 2-zone cooking than any round kamado. Beautifully designed and completely portable. Meathead says it is his preferrred grill.

                      Click here to read our detailed review of the PK 360

                      Click here to order it direct from PK and get a special deal for AmazingRibs.com readers only


                      Fireboard: The Ultimate Top Of The Line BBQ Thermometer

                      fireboard bbq thermometer

                      With the ability to monitor up to six temperatures simultaneously with either Bluetooth or Wifi on your mobile phone, tablet, or computer, Fireboard is the best digital thermometer we’ve tested.

                      Click here to read our detailed review


                      Finally, A Great Portable Pellet Smoker

                      Green Mountain Davey Crockett Grill

                      Green Mountain's portable Davy Crockett Pellet Smoker is one mean tailgating and picnic machine. But it's also gaining popularity with people who want to add a small, set it and forget it pellet smoker to their backyard arsenal. And with their WiFi capabilities you can control and monitor Davy Crocket from your smart phone or laptop.

                      Click here to read our detailed review and to order