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Jokes!

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    Jehovah’s Witnesses don’t celebrate Halloween.

    I guess they don’t appreciate strangers knocking on their doors.

    Comment


    • ComfortablyNumb
      ComfortablyNumb commented
      Editing a comment
      Well, look at the bright side. If they did they would probably hand out Watchtower magazines instead of candy.....

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    • Spinaker
      Spinaker commented
      Editing a comment
      So true. LOL

    "Heard joke once: Man goes to doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world where what lies ahead is vague and uncertain.

    Doctor says, 'Treatment is simple. Great clown Pagliacci is in town tonight. Go and see him. That should pick you up.'

    Man bursts into tears. Says, 'But doctor…I am Pagliacci.' Good joke. Everybody laugh. Roll on snare drum. Curtains."


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    • Spinaker
      Spinaker commented
      Editing a comment
      easily one of my favorite movies! pkadare

    • Red Man
      Red Man commented
      Editing a comment
      Spinaker There’s a Watchmen tv series that just started, I think it’s on HBO. I watched the first episode and thought it was pretty good. Watchmen is definitely one of my favorite movies.

    • Spinaker
      Spinaker commented
      Editing a comment
      I don't have a TV, but I I have heard. I hope they serve it right. I think the movie did a great job of staying pretty close to the book. And I love the cinematography and color scheme through out the movie. Red Man

    A ghost walks into a bar and orders a Jack and Coke, barkeep says “sorry, we don’t serve spirits here”

    Comment


      My wife called me at work and asked, "Do you ever get a shooting pain across your body, like someone's got a voodoo doll of you and they're stabbing it?"

      Me, "No."

      Her, "How about now?"

      Comment


        A PESSIMIST sees a dark tunnel.'

        An OPTIMIST sees light at the end of the tunnel.

        A REALIST sees a freight train.

        The TRAIN ENGINEER sees three idiots standing on the tracks.

        Comment


          My wife will confirm!

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          • Bogy
            Bogy commented
            Editing a comment
            Showed this to my wife. She smirked.

          • gcdmd
            gcdmd commented
            Editing a comment
            The Dude abides.

          • Thunder77
            Thunder77 commented
            Editing a comment
            🤣🤣🤣

          Next year's costume.

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          • ofelles
            ofelles commented
            Editing a comment
            And now I can never un see that 🤔

          • MBMorgan
            MBMorgan commented
            Editing a comment
            No ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ... no ...

          • Elton's BBQ
            Elton's BBQ commented
            Editing a comment
            Im speechless

          I think I'll start a Go Fund Me campaign to buy your costume.

          Comment


          • Bogy
            Bogy commented
            Editing a comment
            And bury it someplace where it will never be seen again.

          • holehogg
            holehogg commented
            Editing a comment
            Potty

          Not sorry
          Attached Files

          Comment


            Had to do it...
            Attached Files

            Comment


            • ScottyC13
              ScottyC13 commented
              Editing a comment
              I get “Beam me up Scotty” all the time.

            • Locotech
              Locotech commented
              Editing a comment
              A friend of mine is Capt. at the fire dept. His last name is Kirk...yep, he's heard them all.

            You may call it a six pack, but to me it is a support group...

            Comment


              Dog: Feed me!
              Me: I just did.
              Dog: You have literally never fed me in my entire life.
              Me: I took a time-stamped photo of your food bowl full of food.
              Dog: Photos can be faked.
              Me: *feeds him again*

              Comment


              • THE Humble Texan
                THE Humble Texan commented
                Editing a comment
                I've got a cat like that.

              • Thunder77
                Thunder77 commented
                Editing a comment
                I love it! This is my dog!

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              • holehogg
                holehogg commented
                Editing a comment
                That pumpkin patch needs some weeding.

              “Doc, I can’t stop singing ‘The Green, Green Grass of Home.’” “That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome.” “Is it common?” Well, “It’s Not Unusual.”

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              • holehogg
                holehogg commented
                Editing a comment
                Improvement

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