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Meat-Up in Memphis 2021

Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early!
Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis)
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Jokes!

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  • RonB
    Club Member
    • Apr 2016
    • 12109
    • Near Richmond VA
    • Weber Performer Deluxe
      SNS
      Pizza insert
      Rotisserie
      Smokenator 1000
      Cookshack Smokette Elite
      2 Thermapens
      Chefalarm
      Dot
      lots of probes.
      CyberQ

    A man and a woman meet in heaven and fall in love. They walk up to God and ask to be married.

    God says give me some time and I’ll get back to you. Three or four years pass and God finally tells the man and woman that he can have them married.

    A few more years pass and the man and woman fall out of love. They approach God once more and this time they ask for a divorce.

    God responds “It took me four years to find a priest in this place. How long do you think it’ll take me to find a lawyer?!”

    Comment


    • Mr. Bones
      Mr. Bones commented
      Editing a comment
      ROFLMMFAO ~!~!~!~!

    • Thunder77
      Thunder77 commented
      Editing a comment
      Lololol!
  • painter
    Club Member
    • Dec 2016
    • 198
    • Denver
    • Primo LG300
      Weber Performer Deluxe
      Maverick 732
      Smobot
      Vortex

    Here's one from Bob Dylan who's reportedly is a big fan of "dumb" jokes. I heard it on the radio show he DJ's "Theme Time Radio Hour with Bob Dylan". This one from a show with the theme "doctors". Think of Bob's voice as you read...

    "I always wanted to be a doctor. I don't know of any other occupation where you can tell a lady to take off her clothes and send the bill to her husband."

    Comment


    • radshop
      radshop commented
      Editing a comment
      I remember that show - Dylan's knowledge of musicology is hard to fathom. Don't remember hearing this joke, though. Good one.
  • RonB
    Club Member
    • Apr 2016
    • 12109
    • Near Richmond VA
    • Weber Performer Deluxe
      SNS
      Pizza insert
      Rotisserie
      Smokenator 1000
      Cookshack Smokette Elite
      2 Thermapens
      Chefalarm
      Dot
      lots of probes.
      CyberQ

    There is a place for all God's creatures.... right next to French fries.

    Comment


    • Bighorn Dave
      Bighorn Dave commented
      Editing a comment
      OR, next to the potatoes and gravy.
  • surfdog
    Club Member
    • Mar 2016
    • 909
    • Sunny SoCal
    • Cooking gadgets
      Weber Summit Charcoal Grill Center
      Weber Summit Platinum D6
      Blue Rhino Razor
      Dyna-Glo XL Premium Dual Chamber
      Camp Chef Somerset IV along with their Artisan Pizza Oven 90
      Anova WiFi

      Thermometers
      Thermapen Mk4 - ThermaQ High Temp Kit - ThermaQ Meathead Kit - ThermaQ WiFi - ThermoWorks IR-GUN-S - ThermoWorks Signals & Billows - ThermoPop -ThermoWorks ProNeedle - ThermoWorks TimeStick Trio x2 - and a Christopher Kimball timer - NO, I do not work for ThermoWorks...I just like their products.

      Other useful bits...
      KitchenAid 7-qt Pro Line stand mixer
      A Black & Decker food processor that I can't seem to murder
      A couple of immersion blenders, one a "consumer" model & the other a "high end" Italian thing. Yes, the Italian one is a bit better, but only marginally
      Instant Pot Duo Evo Plus 8-qt + accessories like egg-bite & egg holders
      All-Clad pots & pans, along with some cast iron...everything from 7" Skookie pans to 8.5qt Dutch ovens
      Weber GBS griddle, pizza stone, and wok
      Knives range from Mercer to F. Dick to "You spent how much for one knife? One knife?!" LOL

    Click image for larger version

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    Comment

    • Mr. Bones
      Birthday Hat Master
      • Sep 2016
      • 8697
      • Kansas Territory
      • Grills / Smokers
        *********************************************

        Kingsford 24" grill (Free) 'Billy'
        Brinkmann Smoke n Grill
        Oklahoma Joe Highland, gaskets, LavaLock baffle / tuning plate. 'Big Joe'
        Weber 18" Kettle ($30 CL) 'Lil' Feller'
        Weber Smokey Joe ($25 CL) 'Lil' Brother'
        Weber 22.5 Master Touch '93 P Code Blue($85) from fellow WKC member Bmitch 'Elwood'
        Weber 22.5 Bar-B-Q Kettle '69-'70 "Patent Pending" Red ($80) from fellow WKC member dwnthehatch 'Maureen'
        Weber 22.5 OTS DD Code Black ($40 CL) 'DeeDee'
        Weber 22.5 OTS DO Code Black ($15 CL)
        Weber 22.5 OTS E Code Black ($20 CL
        Weber 22.5 OTS EE Code Black ($20 CL

        Weber "C" Code 18.5" WSM '81 ($50 CL) 8-0!!!
        Weber "H" Code 18.5" WSM '86 ($75 CL)
        Weber " " Code 18.5" WSM

        Weber 26.75, $199 NFM clearance !!!
        Weber SJS AH 'Lil' Brother'
        Weber SJS AT 'Lil' Sister'
        Weber SJS DE Code (FREE) 'Lil' Helper'
        Weber SJG M Code 'Lil Traveller'
        Weber SJS AH Code 'Kermit'
        (Lime Green)
        Horizon 20" Classic, w/baffle/tuning plate (FREE)
        Good One Open Range, (FREE), Monthly Prize from AR giveaway!!!!



        Thermometers:
        *********************************************
        Ol' Skool Bi-metal probe pocket thermo, that has checked / served ~ 1,000,000 meals in my possession, easily...
        Maverick ET-732, (Black)
        Thermopops, (Red, Yellow, Green)
        ThermaPen Mk4 (Black), THANKS!!! to jgjeske1
        Blue ThermaPen Mk4
        Orange Thermapen Mk4
        Pink Thermapen Mk4
        ThermoWorks IR-GUN-S
        ThermoWorks Smoke
        ThermoWorks Open Box Smoke
        4 Pro Series cable extensions
        Smoke Gateway

        Accessories:
        *********************************************
        2 Slow 'N Sears, Slow 'N Sear XL, Grill 'N Griddle
        BBQ Vortex, 2 Hovergrills, Top Deck
        Warming shelf
        MyWeigh KD-8000Kitchen Scale
        Backyard Grill marinade injector
        Acoustic Guitars/Electric Guitars/Basses/1928 National Duolian/Harmonicas/Banjo Washboard, Spoons, kazoos, pocket comb with wax paper, egg shakers ;-)
        Bear Paws
        Meat Rakes
        BBQ Dragon/Chimley of Insanity, Dragon Wing Shelves (x2 ea.)



        Cookware:
        Probably a ton of cast iron, mostly very old...still cookin'
        G'Ma's Piqua skillet, :-)( They went out of business in 1934~)
        '60's Revere Ware (Mom's), + others found elsewhere
        60's CorningWare 10-cup percolator (Mom's) Daily driver
        50's CorningWare 10-cup percolator (G'Ma's), for a backup! ;-)
        Carpy Wally World stock pots, in approx 2 gal/3gal sizes, blue speckledty-porcelain enameled
        Tramontina 6.5 qt Dutch Oven

        Cutlery, etc.:
        Shi*-ton of kitchen/chef knives, most sharper than my straight-razors are. (Better steel!) Chicago Cutlery, Old Hickory, various, including some nice German stuff ;-)
        Dexter 12" slicing knife, 6" Sani-Safe boning knife
        Smith's Tri-Hone Natural Arkansas Knife Sharpening System
        Multiple steels, from all over the planet
        Crock sticks
        Diamond stones, various
        Lansky Sharpening System

        Tableware
        Daily driver:Washington Forge Mardi Gras, Navy / Cobalt Blue
        Dinner: Guests: Washington Forge, Town and Country
        Fancy / Formal: Family silverware

      Summa my favourite soup!
      Don't git th Store Brand, yall...

      Comment

      • RonB
        Club Member
        • Apr 2016
        • 12109
        • Near Richmond VA
        • Weber Performer Deluxe
          SNS
          Pizza insert
          Rotisserie
          Smokenator 1000
          Cookshack Smokette Elite
          2 Thermapens
          Chefalarm
          Dot
          lots of probes.
          CyberQ

        A lot of conflict in the Wild West could have been avoided completely if…



        …cowboy city planners had just made their towns big enough for everyone.

        Comment


        • Thunder77
          Thunder77 commented
          Editing a comment
          🤣😬
      • ofelles
        Club Member
        • Jun 2018
        • 1673
        • Brentwood CA
        • Yoder YS640 on Comp cart
          Klose 20x42 Charcoal Grill
          LSG Insulated Cabinet
          Jumbo Joe
          VacMaster Pro 380 sealer
          FireBoard and Pit Bull fan
          Thermoworks Signal
          Thermoworks Dot
          Thermopen Mk4

        Guys, I need your help!
        I’m in the middle of an
        argument with my wife
        and she told me I’m right.

        What the hell do I do next?

        Comment


        • holehogg
          holehogg commented
          Editing a comment
          Check the levels of your liqueur bottles.

        • RonB
          RonB commented
          Editing a comment
          Do you happen to live in Stepford?

          https://www.google.com/search?sxsrf=...63.sLb_1Eqa6I8

        • radshop
          radshop commented
          Editing a comment
          Go on a trip - business, hunting, fishing, whatever it takes to get a safe distance from this obvious trap.
      • Locotech
        Charter Member
        • Sep 2014
        • 345
        • northern Ontario, Canada
        • "Livin' hard was easy, when I was young and bulletproof"

        my evenin' laugh...
        Attached Files

        Comment


        • Thunder77
          Thunder77 commented
          Editing a comment
          🤪🤪🤣🤣
      • ofelles
        Club Member
        • Jun 2018
        • 1673
        • Brentwood CA
        • Yoder YS640 on Comp cart
          Klose 20x42 Charcoal Grill
          LSG Insulated Cabinet
          Jumbo Joe
          VacMaster Pro 380 sealer
          FireBoard and Pit Bull fan
          Thermoworks Signal
          Thermoworks Dot
          Thermopen Mk4

        There are two reasons I don’t give money to the homeless!
        1. They use it for drugs and alcohol!
        2. I need it for drugs and alcohol!!

        Comment

        • JCBBQ
          Club Member
          • Jan 2016
          • 1068
          • Jersey City, NJ
          • Primo Oval XL Ceramic Cooker
            Pit Barrel Cooker
            2x Mavrick 732
            Therma Pen Orange
            Favorite Bourbon Blanton's
            SF Giants

            MCS wish list - Lone Star Grillz off set

          Arnie Tex droppin’ bombs 😀😀

          Click image for larger version

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          Comment

          • Craigar
            Founding Member
            • Jul 2014
            • 1078
            • Papillion, NE
            • * - Weber 26.75" OTG
              * - Weber 22.5" Premium cloaked in Crimson
              * - Slow 'N Sear
              * - Smoke E-Z - 26.75" (The Grain Silo)
              * - Lodge Sportsman Grill
              * - Weber Rapid Fire Chimney Starter
              * - Thermoworks ThermoPop
              * - Thermoworks Dot
              * - iGrill2 - 4 probes
              * - Favorite Beer - the cold one in my hand (craft beers of all flavors; haven't had a blue yummy in over 6 years) my tastes change with the season so it is difficult to name just a couple. However, I will occasionally have a vanilla porter float in the summer (Empyrean Vanilla Porter w/a scoop of homemade vanilla ice cream) as I usually drink stouts & porters in the colder months, pale ales & IPAs in the warmer months. I have to add Not Your Father's Root Beer to beers I use for floats.
              * - Booze - I don't really have a favorite, but lean towards single malt Scotch & Irish whiskey
              * - Wines - Reds: mainly the heavy stuff mixed in with the occasional pinot noir ( I have yet to meet a malbec I didn't like); Whites: German & Nebraska (hey, I have to support the home team)
              * - Favorite Spice outlets - Frisco Spices in LaVista, NE (the local butcher supply shop); Volcanic Peppers in Bellevue, NE
              * - Current butchers: Just Good Meats & Fareway Foods

            While shopping in a food store, two nuns happened to pass by the beer, wine, and liquor section. One asked the other if she would like a beer.

            The second nun answered that, indeed, it would be very nice to have one, but that she would feel uncomfortable purchasing it.

            The first nun replied that she would handle it without a problem. She picked up a six-pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier was surprised, so the nun said, "This is for washing our hair."

            Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter and put a package of pretzel sticks in the bag with the beer.

            "The curlers are on me."

            Comment

            • pkadare
              Club Member
              • Jun 2019
              • 827
              • Bobcaygeon, Ontario
              • My gear:
                22 Weber Kettle
                Napoleon PRO Charcoal Kettle Grill
                Broil King Keg
                Traeger Pro 34
                Napoleon Prestige Pro 500
                Pit Barrel Cooker
                Blackstone Range Combo Griddle

              So this isn't really a joke as it happened to me today, but I thought this was an appropriate place to post it.

              Me: This will be just a tiny fart, no way anyone on the meeting call will be able to hear it.

              My ass:
              Click image for larger version  Name:	trumpetfart.jpg Views:	7 Size:	87.6 KB ID:	754685
              Last edited by pkadare; October 11th, 2019, 06:38 PM.

              Comment


              • gcdmd
                gcdmd commented
                Editing a comment
                When I used to go skiing with my kids I would blame it on snow frogs.

              • pkadare
                pkadare commented
                Editing a comment
                I see that your voice is a little deeper but that your breath is still the same.

              • Bogy
                Bogy commented
                Editing a comment
                Ole and Lena are in church, and Lena leans over and whispers to Ole, "I just let out a long, silent fart, what should I do?" Ole says, "Check the batteries in your hearing aids."
            • pkadare
              Club Member
              • Jun 2019
              • 827
              • Bobcaygeon, Ontario
              • My gear:
                22 Weber Kettle
                Napoleon PRO Charcoal Kettle Grill
                Broil King Keg
                Traeger Pro 34
                Napoleon Prestige Pro 500
                Pit Barrel Cooker
                Blackstone Range Combo Griddle

              For those who have worked in, or dealt with an IT department. Click image for larger version

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              Comment


              • JimLinebarger
                JimLinebarger commented
                Editing a comment
                The issue doesn't exist without a ticket. The first movie had been out for a few years when I was at Intel, but none of us thought about that. Would have been fun if we had.
            • josh_karpf
              Club Member
              • Aug 2019
              • 45
              • Brooklyn, NY; Long Beach Island, NJ
              • Master Forge 2-door propane water smoker, Weber Genesis II grill (summertime only)

              Another failed business, seen in Brooklyn yesterday
              Attached Files

              Comment

            • pkadare
              Club Member
              • Jun 2019
              • 827
              • Bobcaygeon, Ontario
              • My gear:
                22 Weber Kettle
                Napoleon PRO Charcoal Kettle Grill
                Broil King Keg
                Traeger Pro 34
                Napoleon Prestige Pro 500
                Pit Barrel Cooker
                Blackstone Range Combo Griddle

              Boss: We're going to start doing random drug testing.
              Me: Okay, but I won't try meth.

              Comment

              Announcement

              Collapse

              Meat-Up in Memphis 2021

              Join us in Memphis for our Meat-Up! Space is limited to 400, secure your spot by booking early!
              Click here for details. (https://amazingribs.com/memphis)
              See more
              See less
              Working...
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              Meat-Up in Memphis

              T-Shirts & More T-Shirts & More
              Order men's and women's T-Shirts, Sweatshirts, Aprons, Mugs, Caps, Tote Bags, Flasks, and more, all imprinted with the Pitmaster Club logo. There's even a spiral bound journal where you can make notes on your cooks.

              Cool Embroidered Shirt Cool Embroidered Shirt
              This beautifully embroidered shirt is the same one Meathead wears in public and on TV. It's wash and wear and doesn't need ironing (really!), but it is a soft cottonlike feel. Choice of four colors and both men's and women's.

              Click here for more info.

              Support ARC

              Many merchants pay us a small referral fee when you click our links and purchase from them. On Amazon it works on everything from grills to diapers, they never tell us what you bought, and it has zero impact on the price you pay, but has a major impact on our ability to improve this site! And remember, we only recommend products we love. If you like AmazingRibs.com, please save this link and use it every time you go to Amazon.

              https://tinyurl.com/amazingribs

              BBQ Stars

              Spotlight

              These are not ads or paid placements. These Are Some Of Our Favorite Tools And Toys.

              These are products we have tested, won our top awards, and are highly recommend. Click here to read how we test, about our medals, and what they mean.

              Use our links when you buy things

              Many merchants pay us a small referral fee when you click our links and purchase from them. On Amazon it works on everything from grills to diapers, they never tell us what you bought, it has zero impact on the price you pay, but has a major impact on our ability to improve this site! If you like AmazingRibs.com, please save this link and use it every time you go to Amazon

              https://tinyurl.com/amazingribs

               


              Placeholder

              Surely you know somebody who loves outdoor cooking who deserves a gift for the holidays, birthday, anniversary, or just for being wonderful. There he is, right in the mirror! Here are our selections of best ideas, all Platinum or Gold Medalists, listed by price.

              Click here to see our list of Gold Medal Gifts


              Digital Thermometers Are Your Most Valuable Tool And Here's A Great Buy!

              maverick PT55 thermometer

              A good digital thermometer keeps you from serving dry overcooked food or dangerously undercooked food. They are much faster and much more accurate than dial thermometers. YOU NEED ONE!

              Click here for more info on the Maverick PT-55 Waterproof Instant-Read Thermometer Review shown above. It may be the best value in a thermometer out there


              If you have a Weber Kettle, you need the Slow 'N' Sear

              slow n sear

              The Slow 'N' Sear turns your grill into a first class smoker and also creates an extremely hot sear zone you can use to create steakhouse steaks.

              Click here for our article on this breakthrough tool


              Bring The Heat With Broil King Signet's Dual Tube Burners

              the good one grill

              The Broil King Signet 320 is a modestly priced, 3-burner gas grill that packs a lot of value and power under the hood. Broil King's proprietary, dual-tube burners get hot fast and are able to achieve high, searing temps that rival most comparatively priced gas grills. The quality cast aluminum housing carries a Limited Lifetime Warranty.

              Click here to read our complete review


              The Good-One Is A Superb Grill And A Superb Smoker All In One

              the good one grill

              The Good-One Open Range is a charcoal grill with an offset smoke chamber attached. It is dramatically different from a traditional offset smoker. The grill sits low in front and doubles as a firebox for the smoke chamber which is spliced on above and behind so it can work like a horizontal offset smoker only better. By placing the heat source behind and under the smokebox instead of off to the side, Open Range produces even temperature from left to right, something almost impossible to achieve with a standard barrel shaped offset.

              Click here to read our complete review


              Pit Barrel Cooker Smoker

              Griddle And Deep Fryer All In One

              The flat top does the burgers and the fryer does the fries. Use the griddle for bacon, eggs, and home fries. Or pancakes, fajitas, grilled cheese, you name it. Why stink up the house deep frying and spatter all over? Do your fried chicken and calamari outside. Blackstone's Rangetop Combo With Deep Fryer does it all. Plus it has a built in cutting board, garbage bag holder, and paper towel holder. An additional work table on the left side provides plenty of counter space.

              Click here to read our detailed review and to order


              Pit Barrel Cooker Smoker

              The Pit Barrel Cooker May Be Too Easy

              The PBC has a rabid cult following for good reason. It is absolutely positively without a doubt the best bargain on a smoker in the world. Period. This baby will cook circles around the cheap offset sideways barrel smokers in the hardware stores because temperature control is so much easier. Best of all, it is only $299 delivered to your door!

              Click here to read our detailed review and the raves from people who own them


              The Undisputed Champion!

              thermapen

              The Thermoworks Thermapen MK4 is considered by the pros, and our team, to be the single best instant read thermometer. Don't accept cheap substitutes.  Click here to read our test results and comprehensive review and why it won our Platinum Medal .


              Compact Powerful Sear Machine For Your Next Tailgater

              Placeholder

              Char-Broil's Grill2Go x200 is a super-portable, fun little sizzler made of heavy, rust-proof cast aluminum. The lid snaps shut. Grab the handle and you're off to the party! Char-Broil's TRU-Infrared design produces searing heat while reducing fuel consumption. A 16 ounce LP gas canister is enough to keep you flipping burgers for hours.

              Click here to read our detailed review and to order


              The Cool Kettle With The Hinged Hood We Always Wanted

              NK-22-Ck Grill

              Their NK22CK-C Charcoal Kettle Grill puts a few spins on the familiar kettle design. In fact, the hinged lid with a handle on the front, spins in a rotary motion 180 degrees. It's hard to beat a Weber kettle, but Napoleon holds its own and adds some unique features to make the NK22CK-C a viable alternative.

              Click here for more about what makes this grill special


              Placeholder

              G&F Suede Welder's Gloves

              Heat Resistant Gloves With Extra Long Sleeves Hold The Hot Stuff

              If you're using oven mitts at the grill, it's time to trade up. Say hello to these suede welder's gloves. They're heat resistant enough to handle hot grill grates, and flexible enough to handle tongs. The extra long sleeves even let you reach deep into the firebox to move hot logs without getting burned. Our Fave.

              Click here to read our detailed review

              Click here to order from Amazon


              GrillGrates Take Gas Grills To The Infrared Zone

              grill grates

              GrillGrates(TM) amplify heat, prevent flareups, make flipping foods easier, keep small foods from committing suicide, kill hotspots, are easier to clean, flip over to make a fine griddle, and can be easily removed and moved from one grill to another. You can even throw wood chips, pellets, or sawdust between the rails and deliver a quick burst of smoke to whatever is above. Every gas grill needs them.

              Click here for more about what makes these grates so special


              PK 360 grill

              Is This Superb Charcoal Grill A Kamado Killer?

              The PK-360, with 360 square inches of cooking space, this rust free, cast aluminum charcoal grill is durable and easy to use. Four-way venting means it's easy to set up for two zone cooking with more control than single vent Kamado grills. It is much easier to set up for 2-zone cooking than any round kamado. Beautifully designed and completely portable. Meathead says it is his preferrred grill.

              Click here to read our detailed review of the PK 360

              Click here to order it direct from PK and get a special deal for AmazingRibs.com readers only


              kareubequ bbq smoker

              Our Favorite Backyard Smoker

              The amazing Karubecue is the most innovative smoker in the world. The quality of meat from this machine is astonishing. At its crux is a patented firebox that burns logs above the cooking chamber and sucks heat and extremely clean blue smoke into the thermostat controlled oven. It is our favorite smoker, period.

              Click here for our review of this superb smoker


              Masterbuilt MPS 340/G ThermoTemp XL Propane Smoker

              masterbuilt gas smoker

              The First Propane Smoker With A Thermostat Makes This Baby Foolproof

              Set ThermoTemp's dial from 175° to 350°F and the thermostat inside will adjust the burner just like an indoor kitchen oven. All you need to do is add wood to the tray above the burner to start smokin'.

              Click here to read our detailed review


              Fireboard: The Ultimate Top Of The Line BBQ Thermometer

              fireboard bbq thermometer

              With the ability to monitor up to six temperatures simultaneously with either Bluetooth or Wifi on your mobile phone, tablet, or computer, Fireboard is the best digital thermometer we’ve tested.

              Click here to read our detailed review


              Finally, A Great Portable Pellet Smoker

              Green Mountain Davey Crockett Grill

              Green Mountain's portable Davy Crockett Pellet Smoker is one mean tailgating and picnic machine. But it's also gaining popularity with people who want to add a small, set it and forget it pellet smoker to their backyard arsenal. And with their WiFi capabilities you can control and monitor Davy Crocket from your smart phone or laptop.

              Click here to read our detailed review and to order